I can't stand to see one of my female children unhappy.

Homer

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Homer Simpson Quotes, The Simpsons Season 22 Episode 18 Quotes, The Simpsons Quotes
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The Simpsons Season 22 Episode 18 Quotes

Masseuses - half doctors, half hookers that solve everything.

Homer

First I work? Then I pay? Then I have to eat fruit? Why was I ever born?

Homer