(to Bart) Keep up the roughhousing, boy. Without a strong male figure, you could turn sissy overnight. (as he's scrubbing his underwear) Oh, these stubborn grass stains.

Homer

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The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 22 Quotes

What is a wedding? Well, Webster's Dictionary defines a wedding as, "the process of removing weeds from one's garden."

Homer

Receptionist: Hello, sir. Are you here for "Coping With Senility?"
Jasper: No. I'm here for "Microwave Cookery" ... No, wait, "Coping With Senility."