Bart: My dog's name is Santa's Little Helper. One time he crawled under the house and when he came out he was covered with ants. Then he ran into a church and drank all the holy water.
The Class: Wow!

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The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 19 Quotes

Marge: Why don't you take this potato? It's pretty big.
Bart: Mom, you're always trying to give me potatoes. What is it with you?
Marge: I just think they're neat.

Principal Skinner: (Over phone) I know Weinstein's parents were upset Superintendent, but I was sure it was a phony holiday. I mean, it sounds so made-up: Yom kip-pur!