Newsweek magazine did say it's good to change careers... right after they laid off all their editors.

Marge

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Marge Simpson Quotes, The Simpsons Season 22 Episode 20 Quotes, The Simpsons Quotes
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The Simpsons Season 22 Episode 20 Quotes

Put a James Taylor CD in the stereo so they think it was a suicide.

Homer

Lisa: You're gonna regret the day you were born.
Bart: I already do, it's too close to Christmas.