Marge: Homey, you sure know how to please a woman.
Homer: As long as it doesn't involve losing weight or changing my pants.

• Permalink: Homey, you sure know how to please a woman. As long as it does...
• Added: May 09, 2011

First five customers get a discount, next five get to hear secrets from the first five.

Julio

• Permalink: First five customers get a discount, next five get to hear secre...
• Added: May 09, 2011

Like Mozart and Johnny Knoxville, my genius can not be stopped.

• Permalink: Like Mozart and Johnny Knoxville, my genius can not be stopped.
• Added: May 09, 2011

It's one of those unsolved mysteries, like how do my clothes get cleaned and get back in my dresser?

Bart

• Permalink: It's one of those unsolved mysteries, like how do my clothes get...
• Added: May 09, 2011

That theremin has paid for itself time and time again.

Principal Skinner

• Permalink: That theremin has paid for itself time and time again.
• Added: May 09, 2011

Newsweek magazine did say it's good to change careers... right after they laid off all their editors.

Marge

• Permalink: Newsweek magazine did say it's good to change careers... right a...
• Added: May 09, 2011

I'm not a hairdresser. I just put a new lid on a couple of trash cans.

• Permalink: I'm not a hairdresser. I just put a new lid on a couple of tras...
• Added: May 09, 2011

You two look good - open casket good.

Grampa

• Permalink: You two look good - open casket good.
• Added: May 09, 2011

Put a James Taylor CD in the stereo so they think it was a suicide.

• Permalink: Put a James Taylor CD in the stereo so they think it was a suici...
• Added: May 09, 2011

Lisa: You're gonna regret the day you were born.
Bart: I already do, it's too close to Christmas.

• Permalink: You're gonna regret the day you were born. I already do, it's ...
• Added: May 09, 2011