Popular Community Quotes
Shirley: My husband's been gone for six months, I think it's time I start embracing being single
Pierce: Message received
I'm barely a student. I'm older than you, I drive a Lexus, I saw Ghost Busters in the theater, and look, my gums are receding
Jeff
Jeff: Are you trying to get formidable on me?
Annie: It worked on pierce
Jeff: Infomercials work in pierce
Jeff: Are you going to the faculty party? Make me your plus one
Senor Chang: Give it up, Winger. Professor Slater doesn't date students... or married asians that drive mopeds
Jeff: In the last two months you've doubled the national average for the amount lived per life time
Pierce: Well I do have a young African American friend
Jeff: But more importantly you're dressed like a gladiator in a desk fort you built during a bad trip
Let's say two people are in a class together and one wants to ask another one out on a grownup date.. but within biking distance of his parents house
Troy
Britta: Are you okay? It looks like you have actual bedhead this morning.
Jeff: In fashion, I'm what's known as a taste-maker.
Britta: And you missed an entire side of your face shaving.
Jeff: And next month, so will Gwen Stefani
Pierce: Before AIDS, sex was like shaking hands.
Abed: Hence AIDS
Downgrading your lifestyle is your chance to grow as a person, maybe even become one.
Britta [to Jeff]
Love is a gamble always, but waiting won't change the dice. Either you roll them or you lose your turn
Shirley [to Annie]
TV's the best dad there is. TV never came home drunk. TV never forgot me at the zoo. TV never abused and insulted me... unless you count Cop Rock
Jeff
The state bar has suspended my license. They found out my college degree was less than legitimate.
Jeff
