You killed my maid, you son of a bitch. Don't you know how hard it is to find good help?

Adrian

Love can't seem to unite us. Why not try hatred?

Evelyn

You took the life a maid and now a maid is going to take yours.

Marisol

Let’s just say it’s better for my marriage if I’m pregnant. Now, shoot me up with everything you’ve got.

Peri

Since I’m beautiful I notice that you two aren’t looking at me.

Carmen

Spence: You’re a monster.
Peri: And yet I seem so nice on my films.

You are the best husband I’ve never married.

Carmen

How can I be terrified of conflict? I'm married to you.

Spence

We’re sorry for your loss. Let us know if you need more tequila.

Carmen

Zoila: You don’t look happy.
Genevieve: That means the poison has set in. Wonderful!

Spence: Aren't you going to kiss your son goodbye?
Peri: I'm already in character and she doesn't have kids.

When I'm in Alexander McQueen, he gets the bottle.

Peri

Devious Maids Quotes

"I don't care about photos. I don't care about evidence. My maid was murdered! Who's going to clean it up?

Evelyn

"I think what you people do is heroic. You wash clothes you can't afford. You polish silver you will never dine with. You mop floors for people who don't bother to learn your last names, and still you dare to dream of a better life. I am in awe of your determination to succeed in this great country of ours. That said, if you don't stop screwing my husband, I'm going to have you deported. Comprende?"

Evelyn