Leslie: Okay, my next song's called, "Phoebe Buffay, What Can I Say? I Really Loved When We Were Singing Partners, And I Shouldn'ta Left You That Way."
Phoebe: Oh no, one of those look-for-the-hidden-meaning songs.

Ross: A hundred million people went to see a movie about what I do. I wonder how many people would go see a movie called Jurassic Parka.
Rachel: Oh, that is so--
Ross: No, no, no, a bunch of out-of-control jackets take over an island! (Ross gasps and throws off his jacket).

Chandler: Just had me a little nubbinectomy. Yep! Two nipples, no waiting.
Monica: Wow. Just like Rachel in High School.
Rachel: What?
Monica: Come on! Come on, I was kidding! It was such an obvious joke!
Chandler: That was an obvious joke; and I didn't think of it. Why didn't I think of it? The source of all my powers! Oh dear God, what have I done!

Monica: My milk's gone bad.
Chandler: I hate that. I once had a thing of half-and-half, stole my car.

(About Leslie) When we were playing together, that was the best time I've had in, like, all my lives.

Phoebe

Joey: Amy just burned Jo's manuscript. I don't see how he could ever forgive her!
Ross: Uh, Jo's a girl, it's short for Josephine.
Joey: But Jo's got a crush on Laurie. Oh, you mean it's like a a girl-girl thing? Cause that's the one thing missing from The Shining!
Chandler: No actually Laurie's a boy.
Joey: No wonder Rachel had to read this so many times!

Joey: Are you just getting home? It's late.
Rachel: Yeah, I know. I had the best day, though. I got to sit in on a meeting with the reps from Calvin Klein, I told my boss I liked this new line of lingerie, she ordered a ton of it . . . how was your day?
Joey: I discovered I'm able to count all of my teeth using just my tongue.

Monica: So, we can be friends who sleep together.
Richard: Absolutely, this'll just be something we do, like racquetball.
Monica: Sounds smart and healthy to me! Um, just out of curiosity, do you have any other racquetball buddies?
Richard: Just your dad. Although that's actually racquetball.

Chandler: Isn't a little cold for you to be wearing shorts?
Robert: Well, I'm from California.
Chandler: Right, sometimes you guys just burst into flame.

Hey buddy, this is a family place. Put the mouse back in the house.

Gunther

Ross: When do you think you're going to get off tonight?
Rachel: Oh I don't know honey. It's gonna be really late.
Ross: Oh come on, not again.
Rachel: I know. I'm sorry. Look, I'll make a deal with you all right? Okay?
Ross: Hm.
Rachel: For every night that you're asleep before I get home from work...
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: I will wake you up in a way that's proved very popular in the past.
Ross: Now, if you need to stay late, I want to be supportive of that.

Joey: All blank and no blank makes blank a blank blank. Oh, and the end, when Jack almost kills them all with that blank but in the last second they get away!
Rachel: Joey! I can't believe you just did that!
Chandler: I can't believe she cracked your code.

Friends Quotes

Ross: I get home, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, "Oh my God, what the hell am I doing?" I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?
Joey: You got all that from saline solution?

Phoebe: (About Ross bringing luggage) How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
Ross: I'm going to China.
Phoebe: Jeez, you say one thing, and...
Monica: You're going to China?
Ross: (Not wanting to get into it) It's for the museum. Someone found a bone. We want the bone. They don't want us to have the bone. I'm going to try to persuade them to give us the bone. It's a whole big bone thing.