Phoebe: Why are you mopping your ceiling?
Monica: There's banana on it.
Phoebe: Oh. I have the spirit of an old Indian woman living in mine.

Ross: Gunther! Please tell me you didn't tell Rachel about me and the girl from the copy center.
Gunther: I'm sorry. Was I not supposed to?

Phoebe: Ooh! We can eat the wax! It's organic!
Chandler: Oh boy, food with hair on it.
Phoebe: Well, not the used wax!
Chandler: Because that would be crazy?

Ross: I made a mistake, okay?
Rachel: A mistake? What were you trying to put it in, her purse?

Monica: Hey. It's three in the morning. They don't know that I've come home yet. You notice how neither one of them are wondering where I am.
Phoebe: Yeah, you know, people can be so self-involved.

Phoebe: They're gonna get through this, aren't they?
Chandler: Yeah, come on, it's Ross and Rachel, they've got too.
Monica: What if they don't?

(Monica pulls off one of the waxing strips and yells in pain)
Phoebe: Was it not "pain-free"?
Monica: No, it was pain-ful! Oh, my God, they should call it "Pain-zine, now with a little wax."

Ross: (About telling Rachel that he slept with another woman) What is she gonna say when I tell her what I did?
Chandler: Well, before we answer that, I think we should address the more important question. How dumb are you?
Ross: What?! Look, we're trying to rebuild a relationship here, right? How am I supposed to do that without being totally honest with each other?
Joey: Look, Ross, look, I'm on board about this totally honesty thing. I am just not about stuff that's gonna get you in trouble.
Chandler: He's right. Nobody's gonna benefit, and you're just gonna hurt her.
Joey: Yeah, and there won't be a relationship left to rebuild.
Ross: Yeah, but don't you think...
Chandler: All right look, if you absolutely have to tell her, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for.

Ross: (About sleeping with Chloe) Listen, can you keep this information to yourself?
Isaac: Aw, no problem dude. You know we got to look out for each other. We're the same, you and me.
Ross: Actually, no, we're not.
Isaac: Yeah, we are.
Ross: No, we're not.
Isaac: Yeah, we are.
Ross: No, we're not!
Isaac: Okay, we're not.
Ross: Right.
Isaac: But, we are.
Ross: Fine. I just need to know that you're not gonna tell your sister.
Isaac: I can promise not to tell her again.

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