Friends

Friends Quotes (Page 13)

Season 3 Episode 9: "The One with the Football"

Monica: We are playing for women everywhere. Okay, just think about every lousy date that you ever had, okay, every guy who kept on the TV while you're making out...
Phoebe: Oh, my God! You dated someone with a glass eye too?!
 • Rating: Unrated

Rachel: There was a Geller Cup?
Ross: Yes, it was the trophy you got if you won the game. But our dad said nobody won that game, and he was sick of our fighting. So he took the trophy... (Ross pauses) threw it in the lake.
Chandler: Was the curse lifted?
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 8: "The One With The Giant Poking Device"

Joey: If the homo sapiens were in fact homo sapiens...is that why they're extinct?
Ross: Joey, homo sapiens are people!
Joey: Hey, I'm not judging!
 • Rating: 4.2 / 5.0

Rachel: Phoebe, you're in pain. Would you just go to the dentist? Just go.
Phoebe: Alright, fine, fine. But if you're my next victim, don't come back as a poltergeist and like suck me into the TV set.
Rachel: I promise.
Phoebe: Although, don't feel like you can't visit.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: Ugly Naked Guy looks awfully still.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I killed him! I killed another one! And this curse is getting stronger, too, to bring down something that big.
 • Rating: Unrated

Rachel: And all these people actually died?
Phoebe: Yes! While I was in the chair! That's why I take such good care of my teeth now. It's not about oral hygiene. I floss to save lives!
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: Something this big and long is going to be difficult to maneuver, fortunately I have a lot of experience in that area.
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: (To Janice) I think you should go back with Gary. I don't wanna be the guy that breaks up a family, ya know when my parents split up, it was because of that guy. Whenever I would see him I was always think ya know "You're the reason, you are the reason why they're not together." and I hated that guy. And it didn't matter how nice he was, or how happy he made my Dad.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: You wanna get her something special, get her flowers. Get her candy. Get her gum. Girls love gum.
Chandler: That's a good idea, "Dear Janice, have a Hubba Bubba birthday!" I would like to get her something serious.
Joey: Oh you want to get her something serious? You know what you should do, you should get her one of those um barium enemas. Those are dead serious.
Chandler: All Right. Look, I'm gonna go in here, and you don't buy me anything ever.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Monica: Well push it in! Push it in!
Rachel: I can not push it in!
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: (About Ugly Naked Guy) He's alive! He's a-live!
Monica: And yet, we're still poking him.
Joey: Okay, retract the device, retract the device.
Ross: He does not look happy.
Rachel: Hey, now he's showing us his poking device.
Joey: Hey, that's never gonna make it all the way over here, buddy!
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: Do you think these pearls are nice?
Joey: I'd really prefer a mountain bike.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: About that bump on his head...
Rachel: Are you sure it's a new bump? I mean, no offense, but I've always thought of Ben as a fairly bumpy-headed child.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: Ugly Naked Guy's using his new hammock. It's like a Play-Doh Fat Factory.
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: (About her dentist) No thanks, I have a good one, too. I just, I, I can't see him.
Chandler: See that is the problem with invisible dentists.
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: Every time I go to the dentist, somebody dies.
Chandler: That is so weird, because every time I go to the dentist, I look down the hygienist's blouse.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: Pheebs, come on, you didn't kill anybody, these people just happened to die when you went to the dentist. It's, it's, it's just ah, a coincidence.
Phoebe: Well tell that to them. Oh! You can't, they're dead.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: Okay, I have a problem I have to go into work for a few hours. Some kids messed up the Homo Sapien display.
Joey: What did they do?
Ross: Well, they painted over the word "Sapien" for one thing, then they rearranged the figures. Let's just leave it at that.
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: Okay, Ben, I won't tell your daddy that you had ice cream for dinner, if you don't tell about our little bonking incident.
Rachel: Monica, number one, I don't think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I... (Joey starts laughing) What?!
Joey: You said number two.
Rachel: I also said number one.
Joey: I know. (Laughs harder)
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: He's not going to say anything because we're not going to tell him.
Rachel: We're not?
Monica: No, we're not.
Rachel: Alright, I like that.
 • Rating: Unrated

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