Favorite House Quotes
Dr. Cuddy: What is that smell? Is it onions? Peppers? Oh, I know... it's a sausagefest.
House: Sausagefest implies multiples. Now, if you're talking about yardage, I'd have to agree.
E coli is found in animals. So unless he's drinking pork cider... pork cider! I need the number of the patent office.
House: Why aren't you guys in my office?
Dr. Foreman: Why are you in the building? It's eight in the morning.
House: Where's Chase?
Taub: He's not here because it's eight in the morning.
Masters: Smallpox was eradicated over 30 years ago.
House: So were hush puppies. Have you checked out your local hipster coffee shop lately?
Geerte: Oh, yes. My names is Geerte. Are you handsome, sexiest American man?
House: You know, some people - I would say that I am, yeah.
House: I want you to translate something for me.
Geerte: Why do you want I translate? I do topless, toys, and...
Masters: Just do the translation.
House: She can translate however she feels most comfortable.
Masters: Scrofula. That's what they called cervical T.B. lymphadenitis in the 1700s.
House: Scrofulicous. That's what they called "annoying" in the 1700s
Dr. Chase: You just tried this. I'm not a better liar than Foreman.
House: Sure you are. You're descended from convicts.
Masters: So I guess honesty is the best policy.
House: Why'd you say that? Seriously... to establish your viewpoint as if I didn't already know it. Or to demonstrate some weird cross-generational female solidarity with Cuddy?
Masters: Actually, I was just trying to fill the awkward silence.
House: Oh.
Look, I don't want to go all Godfather on you. This was business.
Dr. Chase: Sorry I took off on you.
Dr. Foreman: Twice?
Dr. Chase: First one was my bad. Second one, I had no choice. It was a threesome.
Taub: They're overrated.
Foreman and Chase: (together) He's bluffing.
Taub: I was mugged once. When I saw the gun, my legs went out.
Dr. Chase: I always thought it was fight or flight. Didn't know it was fight or flight or faint.
