Favorite How I Met Your Mother Quotes
Zha Zha Gabor still looks good.
Barney
Hang in there Scoots I'm not gonna live forever.
Marshall
I need a drink, do we have any cough syrup in here?
Lily
Lily: Baby, I need to do something and I can't do it in front of you. It will change the nature of our relationship.
Marshall: What is it?
Lily: I need to pee
Robin: Well, it looks like it's gonna be just you and me.
Barney: Really?
Robin: Actually, I was talking to my martini
Robin: No. I thought we're just hanging out as friends.
Barney: Oh, come on. You've been throwing yourself at me all night.
Robin: What? I did the opposite, I threw some other girl at you.
Barney: You invited me up to your apartment to play Battleship. Is that not an international recognized term for sex?
A drum roll?! That's it? So what you just said good night, came home and performed a drum solo?
Marshall
Marshall: Maybe she was a ghost. That's why she didn't want to kiss you because you'd pass right through her and get really cold for a second. Oh my God, I just had a great idea for a screenplay.
Ted: Marshall, she was not a ghost.
Marshall: I know she wasn't a ghost. She picked up a bouquet proving she had corporeal form
Victoria: Those big romantic moments... they're great when they happen, but they're not real.
Ted: Exactly. Exactly! Like, like just now, when I saw you doing the chicken dance out there, I'm not gonna lie to you, big time thunderbolt.
Victoria: Hmmm, you should see me tap-dance. You'd be down on bended knee.
Ted: Sadly, not out of character
Marshall: Aww ... Lilllly ... babieeeeees!
Barney: I hope Ted is miserable right now.
Don: You're stuck in a dead end gig, surrounding by people going, doing the news in your tightie whities.
Robin: That underwear thing as your choice, and I don't like that it's catching on.
Barney: Rule #83. If anything coming out of that child's mouth lands on me, I get to touch Lily's boobs.
Marshall: Dude, what is it with you and my wife's boobs tonight?
