How I Met Your Mother

How I Met Your Mother Season 1 Quotes (Page 6)

Season 1 Episode 11: "The Wedding"

Marshall: Ok, I'm just saying that it's my wedding too and I should have a say in it.
Lily: But I'm the bride. So, I win.
Marshall: But I thought marriage is about two equal partners, sharing a life together.
Lily: Right but I'm the bride. So, I win
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Robin: How fancy are we talking about here?
Ted: Oh, you gonna wanna bring your A-game.
Robin: Oh, I'll bring it. I'll bring it so hard, the bride's gonna look like a big white bag of crap.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Claudia: No, no, no.... Listen to me, if I go to my wedding and the cake is not Tahitian vanilla, I will come down there and burn your little shop to the ground. Haha, do you wanna find out if I'm kidding?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall: Being in a couple is hard. And committing, making sacrifices, it's hard. But if it's the right person, then it's easy. Looking at that girl and knowing she's all you really want out of life, that should be the easiest things in the world. And if it's not like that, then she's not the one. I'm sorry
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted [seeing Robin in her dress]: Still wow.
Robin: Wow yourself. Look who else brought it.
Ted: Oh, yeah. I thought about leaving it at home, but I figured, I don't want to get there and realize I need it and have to go all the way back to get it, so yeah, I brought it
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: I mean seriously, Claudia and Stuart? I mean I have hooked up with the odd lass who is beneath my level of attractiveness... but... you know I was drunk. There is no way Claudia has been drunk for three years
 • Rating: Unrated

Marshall: Oh please, we all know how this movie ends. Ted falls in love. Love kicks Ted in the sprouts. Roll credits
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall: So you admit it, the groom should have an equal say.
Lily: Oh, yeah, sure, on the stupid stuff, like who comes.
Marshall: So I can invite whoever I want.
Lily: Sure, there's plenty of room in the woods
 • Rating: Unrated

Marshall [to Ted]: Oh, you went around the bride. Oh, this hornet's nest looks harmless. Maybe I'll poke it with a stick. Oh, look, some gremlins, let me go feed them after midnight
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lily: Honey, this magazine says more and more couples are opting to have nontraditional weddings out in the woods.
Marshall: Well, if a magazine says so, we should go get married in the woods like a couple of squirrels.
Lily: Squirrels don't get married, Marshall.
Marshall: Like you could possibly know that
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: Wow, thanks for being so cool about this cause you know Claudia said...
Stuart: Yeah, yeah, yeah. This morning at the rehearsal, Claudia called our 7-year-old flower girl a whore. So, don't take it personally, she's just a little stressed.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lily [about asking to bring a date]: You can always ask Stuart.
Ted: Can I do that?
Lily: Sure, you guys have been friends for a long time, and it's 40% his wedding too
 • Rating: Unrated

Ted: Our friends Claudia and Stuart are having this crazy, black-tie wedding on Saturday. You wanna be my "plus one?"
Robin: Ooh, "plus one," you make it sound so romantic
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Future Ted: When you're single and your friends start to get married, every wedding invitation presents a strange moment of self-evaluation. Will you be bringing a guest or will you be attending alone? What it's really asking is where do you see yourself in three months? Sitting next to your girlfriend or hitting on a bridesmaid? I always checked that I was bringing a guest. I was an optimist
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 1 Episode 11: "The Limo"

Ted: Yes, Barney, your submissions were received and no, we will not be attending any parties in your pants
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: People often ask me "Barney how is that you're so psyched so much of the time"?
Lily: By who? Who asks you that? edit »
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: Oh sure laugh, laugh for Barney Stinson. Laugh for the sad clown trapped on his whirling carousel of suits and cigars and bimbos and booze. Round and round it goes, and where's it all heading? Nowhere
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lily: So where are you from, Natalya?
Barney: She...who knows. The former Soviet republic of Drunk-Off-Her-Ass-Istan?
 • Rating: Unrated

Marshall: Look at us, riding around in a limo, eating hot dogs... It's like we're the president
 • Rating: Unrated

Ted: You're not... Moby, are you?
Bald Guy: Who?
Ted: Moby... The recording artist, Moby.
Bald Guy: Oh, no.
Ted: But when we said "Hey, Moby" you said "Yeah".
Bald Guy: Oh, I thought you said Tony.
Ted: So your name's Tony?
Bald Guy: No
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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