How I Met Your Mother Season 1 Quotes
Long distance is a lie teenagers tell each other to get laid the summer before collegeTed
Victoria: Well boyfriends, I've only had 2.
Robin: Prude alert!
Victoria: Well, that's serious boyfriends, I've dated other guys in between.
Robin: Slut alert!
Believe it or not, I was not always as awesome as I am todayBarney
Lily: You ralphed and ran?
Marshall: I thought you were vomit free since 93. So that was a lie.
Robin: You re-returned for me. That's really sweet, though you kinda ruined my customized Scherbatsky doormat
Hi, leg warehouse? Yeah, my friend Ted needs something to stand on... So, nothing for him to stand on? Ok, thanks so muchBarney [making a fake phone call]
Plus, here's the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on top of the sundae of awesomeness that is my lifeBarney
My life rocks! Money, suits, and sex? These are tears of joy! I could be cooped up in an apartment, changing some brat's poopy diaper but instead I'm out in the world being awesome 24/7/365! You let me dodge a bullet, big guyBarney
Victoria, that was an honest and mature answer. You may advance to the Gumdrop MountainsMarshall
Victoria: I will tell you my most humiliating story.
Marshall: Yeah, Victoria! Way to step up.
Victoria: OK, it involves a game of Truth or Dare, a squeeze bottle of marshmallow ice cream topping, and the hot tub at my grandparent's retirement community.
Future Ted: ... Kids, I tell you a lot of inappropriate stories, but there's no way I'm telling you this one. Don't worry, it wasn't that great...
Marshall: That is the greatest story ever!
Marshall: Well, we have the whole place to ourselves...
Lily: I'm thinking...floor sex!
Marshall: Sounds reasonable
We spend so much effort trying to keep parts of our lives hidden, even from our closest friends, that those rare times when we do open up, it's amazing how minor those secrets all end up beingFuture Ted
Backgammon sucks. I took the only good part of backgammon, the gammon, and I left the rest of it in the trash where it belongsMarshall