How I Met Your Mother

How I Met Your Mother Season 4 Quotes (Page 3)

Season 4 Episode 16: "Sorry, Bro"

Barney: ...a hug is just like a public dry hump
Marshall: I think you're hugging wrong
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall [in zombie voice making fun of Karen]: I want to eat your brain.. but only if it's organic and grass fed
 • Rating: 4.3 / 5.0

Season 4 Episode 15: "The Stinsons"

Loretta (Barney's Mom): Barney, when you were three I left you with a babysitter and spent three weeks with Grand Funk Railroad being passed around like a bong
 • Rating: Unrated

Lily [to Marshall]: Hey you want to go do it in Barney's childhood bed again?
Barney: My race car bed?
Marshall: It handles great buddy
 • Rating: Unrated

Woman: You said that if I slept with you my son would get the part
Barney: Well apparently I'm a better actor than your kid
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: Where does this woman live?
Robin: We're talking about a woman that actually Barney Stinson to commit, I'm guessing Narnia
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 4 Episode 14: "The Possimpible"

Robin: I can't break 15 bricks with my forehead.
Barney: Robin, it's not 1950 anymore. Yes, you can
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: That's what corporate America wants: people who seem like bold risk takers, but never actually do anything
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: All my life I have dared to go past what is possible.
Interviewer: To the impossible?
Barney: Actually, past that. To the place where the possible and the impossible meet, to become... the possimpible.
Lily: The possimpible? Really?
Barney: Inventing your own word shows creativity and vision—Visitivity
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: Lottery girl's on.
Robin: I just feel sorry for these women. This is where broadcast careers go to die.
Barney: Check it out, I made a little game.
Lottery Girl: And tonight's lotto numbers are: 19,
Barney: Age you moved to New York after a photographer "discovered" you at a food court and said he would get you into Vogue Magazine.
Lotto Girl: 53,
Barney: Number of semi-nude pictures he took of you before you realized he had no connection to Vogue Magazine.
Lotto Girl: 22,
Barney: Age you claim you are.
Lotto Girl: 31,
Barney: Age you actually are.
Lotto Girl: 45,
Barney: Number of minutes it would take me to get you into a cab, out of your dress and into my Jacuzzi.
Lotto Girl: And tonight's Super Big Ball is...
Barney: What happens after we get out of the Jacuzzi. What Up!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lily: Doctor X, you're still bragging about Doctor X?
Robin: Who's Doctor X?
Ted: Nobody knows. He was this genious mystery DJ.
Marshall: It was Ted.
Ted: His identity remains a mystery to this day.
Lily: It was Ted.
Ted: But this phantom of the airwaves changed the very face of college radio.
Marshall: It was Ted.
Lily: And your show sucked
 • Rating: 3.3 / 5.0

Season 4 Episode 13: "Three Days of Snow"

Robin: Thanks for coming by. I monkeyed around with the thermostat for about an hour before I realized it was the intercom.
Marshall: Yeah, I heard you swearing downstairs
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Ted: Can't you just leave the place open a little while longer? We'll keep an eye on things.
Carl: You two? No way, you wouldn't know the first thing about running a bar.
Barney: Serve the hotties first?
Carl: Here's the keys
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: We should buy a bar.
Barney: Of course, we should buy a bar!
Ted: We should totally buy a bar.
Barney: We should totally buy a bar. Our bar would be awesome. And dude, dude, dude, dude... the name of our bar... Puzzles. People will be, like, "Why is it called Puzzles?". That's the puzzle
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Ted: So, how many people are in on this Party School Bingo thing?
Barney: Oh, it's just me.
Ted: So what's the point, then?
Barney: The point is to get five in a row.
Ted: And what do you get when you get five in a row?
Barney: I get Bingo
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Brunette: I don't know if you guys have ever seen Star Wars, but it's like Hoth out there.
Ted: Dibs.
Blonde: It reminds me of when I used to go sledding with my dad—before he left.
Barney: And dibs
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Robin: I still say this is stupid. What happened to, "As we mature, the relationship matures with us?"
Marshall: That's just something Lily read in Psychology Today. Alright, she read it in Cosmo. Alright, I read it in Cosmo. Alright, it was CosmoGirl!
 • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0

Lily [on the phone]: Hey, baby. It's lunchtime, and I love you.
Marshall [on phone in front of co-workers]: I reciprocate in principle, although with the caveat that there seems to be a bit of a surplus here on my end.
Lily: No, I love you more.
Marshall: Do we need to get in a room together and bang this thing out? (pause) Those sound like agreeable terms, although I may need to adjust my briefs
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 4 Episode 12: "Benefits"

Ted: So, last night Robin left the pizza box out on the floor, so we had sex three times.
Marshall: Sure.
Ted: And then this morning, before I left for work, we kissed.
Marshall: Oh, that's weird. That is weird!
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Barney: So I explained to her, I said Madelin, every single international conflict essentially boils down to sexual tension
Ted: Every international conflict?
Barney: Every single one, dude
Ted: So the crisis in the middle east could be solved by?
Barney: Gaza Strippers. Next.
Ted: Apartheid?
Barney: Apart Thighs? What else you got?
Ted: Cold war.
Barney: Ms. Gorbachev, Take Down Those Pants
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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