Jersey Shore

Jersey Shore

Thursdays 10:00 PM on MTV

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Season: 5 4 3 2 1

Jersey Shore Quotes (Page 6)

Season 5 Episode 2: "One Man Down"

Deena: I don't know who I'm gonna make out with but it's gonna be someone good.
 • Rating: Unrated
Snooki: It's important to look your hottest the first night of Karma, just because if you don't look hot the first night of Karma, karma will get you.
 • Rating: Unrated
JWOWW: Wow you look really good.
Snooki: Would you bang me?
JWOWW: Bent over and sideways.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Deena: [to Pauly] Even though you a little off your A game, you're still gonna bring back b#@ches tonight and have sex. I'm just saying.
 • Rating: Unrated
Snooki: I never thought in my wildest dreams that I would tell anybody in this house to stop tanning... that's when you know the world is coming to an end.
 • Rating: Unrated
Pauly D: So it peeled and then I exfoliated and then I burnt that part that peeled ... Pauly D problems.
 • Rating: Unrated
Pauly D: I got no tan in Italy so I got a little excited, I went tanning in Jersey, went tanning went tanning went tanning ... I burnt my whole f--kin' face off.
 • Rating: Unrated
Pauly D: We're going to get mani-pedis.
Vinny: You know, guy stuff.
 • Rating: Unrated
Vinny: What are you doing now?
Pauly: Waiting for you, let's get a pedicure.
 • Rating: Unrated
JWOWW: I didn't even put on underwear today.
 • Rating: Unrated
Snooki: Jionni's like "don't drink so much, don't black out" ... I can't even get drunk with my roommates.
 • Rating: Unrated
Pauly D: I never felt so violated in my life.
 • Rating: Unrated
Ronnie: I probably shouldn't have done that in front of Vin, I think Vin got a little mad because that's his bi$#h.
 • Rating: Unrated
Mike: All it is is you got to know how to play chess. If you don't know how to play chess, maybe drop down and try checkers.
 • Rating: Unrated
Situation: But uh, Jionni's hungry right now, he wants to eat this sandwich, he wouldn't be cooking if he wasn't.
 • Rating: Unrated
Situation: It's very ironic that Jionni's borrowing my clothes and cooking in the kitchen right now for me, and Paula's just sitting there waiting ... now that's a situation!
 • Rating: Unrated
Snooki: Mike has cooties, so that fact that my man is wearing Mike's clothes, I'm just like, uh, I hope their clean.
 • Rating: Unrated
Situation: I'm like yeah, we share girls why can't we share underwear.
 • Rating: Unrated
Mike: Paula's looking smoking right now and not to be disrespectful, Paula's a sweet girl but let's be honest... it's a sure thing.
 • Rating: Unrated
Mike: I had met Paula the first summer in NJ, we were in the Jacuzzi together, and I think Paula may have fell down the stairs as well.
 • Rating: Unrated

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Season: 5 4 3 2 1
Total Season 5 Quotes: 168
Total Jersey Shore Quotes: 912
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