Modern Family

Modern Family Quotes (Page 5)

Episode 6: "Go Bullfrogs!"

Phil: When I talk to my old friends from college do we croak or do we bark?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Haley [to Phil]: Are you trying to ruin college for me before it even starts?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Claire: Alright ladies. Go home, roll up your hair and clap off the lights because this guy, who I just met, is gonna show me a good time.
Mitchell: If he was straight this would be just like high school.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Claire [to Mitchell and Cam]: When did you two become such old women?
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Claire: I have 3 kids, I've been tired since 2005.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mitchell: I don't know about you but I've got about five minutes of fabulous left.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Episode 5: "Hit and Run"

Phil Dunphy: I'll admit it. I'm turned on by powerful women.
Michelle Obama, Oprah, Condoleezza Rice, Serena Williams… Wait a minute.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Manny: I guess I'm too proud to ask for help.
Jay: Are you kidding? She still cuts your steak.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mitchell [to Cam, Jay, Phil]: Fine I'll see you in jail! It's gonna be a big adjustment for two of you.
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Claire: I take my eye off the ball for one minute and I've got one kid in a coma, one with a black eye, and one running a crime ring.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Phil: No cops! We can't afford a scandal right now! Claire's running for town council.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Cam: He wasn't armed, he had a Hillary bumper sticker.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Jay: He wants more wow. What does that even mean?
Manny: It's the Bieberization of America.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Luke [about his money]: It's in a block of ice. I got the idea when I heard a bunch of rich guys talking about their frozen assets. Haha assets.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phil [to Claire]: If you wanna fly I'm not gonna hold your feet to the ground, I'm gonna be the one to push you off the cliff.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Gloria: Manny, sometimes you can be a little old fashioned. Remember the first time you saw the kids with the backpacks with wheels and you thought they were a little flashy?
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Manny: I wanna be home-schooled.
Gloria: Really Manny? You want me to learn you English?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Episode 4: "Door to Door"

Cam: Mitchell you are not going to believe this. I'm out with Gloria looking for her dog and I'm wearing an undershirt and I'm screaming STELLA just like in "Street Car"!
 • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0

Manny: You'll never go broke playing into a rich guy's ego. Write THAT down.
 • Rating: 4.6 / 5.0

Luke: How many moms does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Phil: How many?
Luke: None because she's got you to do that sucker.
 • Rating: 4.4 / 5.0

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