Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern-family

I've been lonely. Having a mirror in my room will be like having company.

Haley

What happened to him? He didn't used to be that self-conscious before high school. He used to go around in his poncho, play the band flute. I miss my old Manny.

Gloria

A happy kid is like an anti-depressant. But a natural one, not the kind your husband has to find in your jewelry drawer.

Phil

Haley: Oh my God I'm missing a text.
Alex: It just got real didn't it?

Her head sounds like pop rocks.

Cam

You win an Oscar. You buy a Golden Globe.

Cam

I have a mandate and not the kind you hide from your wife.

Gil

That's different, that was gossip and gossip belongs to everyone.

Cam

Gloria: Some people you turn your back for one second and they have another family from the bad side of town.
Jay: You ARE my other family from the bad side of town.

Should you be more worried that Haley has a nurse's uniform in her closet?

Alex

Do you see anything suspicious? Like smoke, or paraphernalia, or nachos?

Claire

Mitchell: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.
Cam: Well you did and do you know what the sad thing is? We could be laughing at someone's calf implants right now.

Displaying quotes 73 - 84 of 1213 in total

Modern Family Quotes

I'm sort of like Costco. I'm big, I'm not fancy and I dare you to not like me.

Cameron

Phil: I'm just excited. After today you're going to be a councilwoman and I'm going to be a first husband.
Claire: If you don't stop filming, you're going to be MY first husband.

×