Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern-family

Oh my gosh, an actual gay agenda.

Cam

Hey luxury bathroom, it's me lowly closet. Watch your back.

Jay

Excuse me, how much is that doggie in the window?

Gloria

I am my father's daughter, and sorta his son.

Claire

I love film-making and I love love. I guess you could say I enjoy making love on film and I love doing it by myself.

Phil

Cam: Do you feel what's happening here?
Mitchell: I feel pinching!
Cam: I'm the weak link in the super-group.

He says the only tool you need is a sense of humor.

Luke [about Phil]

Gloria: This is fun for me. You're my stepdaughter.
Claire: I'm older than you.

Mitchell: You know I'm surprised this particular foursome doesn't hang out more, considering...
Alex: We're the cultured ones in this family?

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