Gibbs: You said you were looking for a project. Go find her.
Senior: You serious?
Gibbs: You got something better to do?

• Permalink: You got something better to do?
• Rating: Unrated

Vance: Well, at this point we can't charge either one of them. Whoever we brought to trial...her defense would be that the other one did it.
Gibbs: I agree with you. There's so much reasonable doubt, a jury could never convict.

• Permalink: I agree with you. There's so much reasonable doubt, a jury could never convict.
• Rating: Unrated

Susan: Dad I've been looking all over for you.
Tony: Oh. Do I have a sister I don't know about?
Senior: Don't joke, Junior. There's obviously something wrong with her. You've mistaken me for someone else.
Susan: There's so much I have to tell you.
Tony: Here you go. Here's a little something. Get yourself something to eat.
Susan: Dad. Please don't leave me.

• Permalink: Dad. Please don't leave me.
• Rating: Unrated

I'm expecting a call from a jeweler. I've been looking at diamond rings.

McGee

• Permalink: I'm expecting a call from a jeweler. I've been looking at diamond rings.
• Rating: Unrated

So, are these two women (who supposed hate one another) conspiring to cover up the truth?

Ducky

• Permalink: So, are these two women conspiring to cover up the truth?
• Rating: Unrated

Tony: What's the matter?
McGee: I'm getting a call from myself.
Bishop: Answer it. See what you want.

• Permalink: Answer it. See what you want.
• Rating: Unrated

Gibbs: So listen. Stretch. This isn't a game. You've got one shot at your friend. No fooling around.
Tall Tony: Don't worry. I'm an actor.
Gibbs: Yeah. That's what I'm worried about.

• Permalink: Yeah. That's what I'm worried about.
• Rating: Unrated

I feel like I don't know who I am. And it's strange, because she stole my identity, right? But I feel like I already lost my identity. What is this? Seriously, is this some kind of weird metaphor for my current psychological state?

Tony

• Permalink: I feel like I don't know who I am. And it's strange, because she stole my identity, right?...
• Rating: Unrated

I mean I get swindled by a bimbo, I've got Laurel and Hardy impersonating me. What about the third guy? Is he a buffoon? Is that who I am?

Tony

• Permalink: I mean I get swindled by a bimbo, I've got Laurel and Hardy impersonating me. What about the...
• Rating: Unrated

Gibbs: How did you meet her the first time?
Tony: I met her in a bar.
Gibbs: Let me guess. She approached you.
Tony: They usually do, but...I was a target.
Gibbs: An easy one!

• Permalink: An easy one!
• Rating: Unrated

Did you happen to catch her name, DiNozzo, or is that not the way dates work anymore?

Gibbs

• Permalink: Did you happen to catch her name, DiNozzo, or is that not the way dates work anymore?
• Rating: Unrated

Tony: How long have I been working for NCIS?
Tiny Tony: Long enough that you should be making better money. Wait for it...wait for it....yup. You're pathetic.
Tall Tony: I'm not even that good at memorizing lines, but you were easy. You have no life.
Tiny Tony: It's true. No wife, no kids, no hobbies. Same job, same apartment. Nothing changes with you.

• Permalink: It's true. No wife, no kids, no hobbies. Same job, same apartment. Nothing changes with you.
• Rating: Unrated