NCIS

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Ncis
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This kind of stuff is illegal in most states. In certain parts of Europe it's ... this is bad behavior.

Tony

McGee: What are you doing? I'm not the sidekick.
Tony: I'm the boss when Gibbs isn't here.
Gibbs: Gibbs is here.

McGee: Face it, you think you're too good looking to be the sidekick.
Tony: According to women, I'm too good looking.
Ziva: Actually I find McGee the more handsome.

Gibbs: Is that it?
Yeah. What else is there?
Gibbs: Well, maybe we send a couple of agents.
Tony: A couple of agents?
Gibbs: You know, put some eyes on the target. Change the circumstances.
Tony: And you can sell that to Vance?
Gibbs: Oh yeah.

[after killing Salim] Let's go home.

Gibbs

Ziva: You got captured ... on purpose?
Tony: Yeah.
Ziva: These people are killers, Tony.
Tony: That's why we have to stay alive long enough to not get dead.
Ziva: That would involve getting rescued.
Tony: Yes it would.

McGee: [on Ziva's ship] There's no record of it.
Tony: Why not?
Gibbs: It was lost at sea. Damacles went down on the 28th of May off the coast of Somalia. There were no survivors.

Tony: So, how was your summer?
Ziva: Out of everyone in the world who could have found me, it had to be you.
Tony: You're welcome.

Abby: It's weird Ziva hasn't contacted me. I mean it would be one thing if she simply hadn't picked up the phone and called me, but I've tried to contact her several different ways.
McGee: Psychics, crystals or telepathy?

Rebecca: So why is Detective McGree conducting the interrogation?
Tony: We prefer the term interview. Less of a negative connotation.
Rebecca: Got it.

Tony: It's all about chemistry. The zing, the pahh!
McGee: What do you mean, 'pahh'?
Tony: You know ... pahh.

If I could drag her back I would, in a heartbeat. But it's no use. Ziva David is dead.

Tony
Displaying quotes 649 - 660 of 714 in total

NCIS Quotes

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.

Tony: You know the "Men" in "Men's Room" is more of a rule than a suggestion, probie.
Bishop: Look, you two always get to go off giggling to the urinal together and I always get left out. So we're going to talk and we're going to do it here.