New Girl

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New girl
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Coincidentally, I'm wearing my lap dance pants!

Schmidt

Schmidt: Tonight was tens across the board. No splash. Nobody's ever done anything like that for me before.
Jess: Anytime, Schmidt. Anytime.

Benjamin [referring to Jess]: Are you hitting that?
Schmidt: What? No!
Benjamin: Then I think I'll help myself...to sex with your friend.

Kim: Does that mean no more sexy Easter bunny?
Schmidt: No sexy Easter bunny.
Kim: What about cinco de Sexy?
Schmidt: No cinco de Sexy.
Kim: And no sexy Martin Luther King?
Schmidt: I can never get the voice. I never felt I had the authority.

Schmidt: Kim, I'm not gonna be sexy Santa anymore. It's over. Santa's dead. I killed him.
Evan: Aaaaaaah!

Jess: Why are you guys hugging?
Nick: Just Guy Talking.
Paul: About uh, how moved we are about jazz music.
Nick: That's a lie. I told him you didn't love him.
Jess: What?!
Paul: But he said it nicely!

Nick: Has Jess not talked to you?
Paul: Oh yea, we've talked.
Nick: It's hard, it's really tricky. It's like, she's doesn't love you right, Paul that's not to say she might not fall in love with you later.
Paul. We talked about how we might have to drive you to the airport cause you're gonna miss your flight.
Nick: Yea, that's probably all you talked about so I'm joking.

Paul: No it's great I love it! It's funny, and quirky and so sweet. It's like you. And that's why I love it. I love it! Thank you. I love it...I love you.
Jess: ...Thank you...
Paul: ...You're welcome.
Jess: No, you're welcome.

Schmidt: I hope you appreciate that I have kept eye contact with you the whole time and have made to reference to the fact that you are basically naked.
Cece: Very proud of you Schmidt.

Jess: My initial thought was to get him a gift certificate for piping hot sex. But I don't want him to think I'm using him for his body.
Nick: Oh, I'm sure he'd be ok with that.

Schmidt: Marry Christmas, Brendan, don't swallow these. Love, Uncle Nick?
Nick: It's a great gift. He's a twelve-year old kid. He's gonna love them.

I can't believe Jess got me roller-blades for Christmas. I feel so freeee!

Winston
Displaying quotes 85 - 96 of 179 in total

New Girl Season 1 Quotes

Get rid of it, Jess. Pine has no place in this loft. It's the wood of poor people and outhouses.

Schmidt

Nadia: Jew in the couch!
CeCe: Nadia, American manners!
Nadia: Sorry. Jew person in couch.
Schmidt: She's not wrong.