Orange is the New Black
Fridays 8:00 PM on NetflixOrange is the New Black Season 1 Quotes
You think this is the first time I've heard about the chicken? It's popular fiction. It's like global warming and female ejaculation.
Healy
All I wanted was to eat the chicken that was smarter than other chickens and to absorb its power and enjoy a nice Chicken Kiev but, oh well.
Red
Howard: You want to know if she fingered her. I think that's been established.
Larry: Dad, please. No jokes. I can't take it right now.
I figured it out when you thought Stations of the Cross was Christian radio.
Sister Ingalls
Pornstache: How did you survive infancy?
Pennasatucky: My auntie helped my mama.
Pornstache: That was a rhetorical question. Don't you understand what the hell a rhetorical question is?!
Woah, that's not happening, and you don't just turn gay. You fall somewhere on a spectrum. It's like a Kinsey scale.
Piper
God has chosen to test our conviction.
Pennsatucky
First girl who bags that bird gets a box of Biore strips.
Red
I had my tea, it was almost hot. I had my book, it was almost good. And I saw a chicken. How random is that?
Piper
Aw man, I was just starting to like you. You gonna go soft on me Vause?
Nicky
Nicky: What was your major?
Alex: Oh, I just lived on campus and went to parties.
I haven't quite figured it out yet, but I'm going to be able to rewire a lamp. Soon. And I'm very excited about that. I always felt I lacked practical skills in life. And I don't know.
Piper