Andy: April, you're like an angel with no wings.
April: So like a person?

I think the entire government should be privatized. Chuck E. Cheese could run the parks. Everything operated by tokens. Drop in a token, go on the swing set. Drop in another token, take a walk. Drop in a token, look at a duck.

Ron

April: You know what? I think men are better than women.
Ann: She's kidding.
April: No I'm not. They provide for us and we must obey them because they are our masters.

Your ambiguous ethnic blend perfectly represents the dream of
the American melting pot.

Leslie

Did I do basketball?

Tom

Sir, I formally retract my hug.

Chris

If I had to have anybody tell me that I have cancer, I would want it to be me.

Chris

Ann: That's Mission Im-Pawnee-able: Knope Protocol.

Ben: Should we talk about how you claimed your mom was a Filipino woman you've never met.

Leslie: Should we?

Leslie: You forgot the last sentence.
Ron: No I didn't - I remember that part. It says "hire her."

So what did you guys talk about? Old times? Oh, I love talking about old times. New times are great too, but there's just something about old times. You know what I mean?

Leslie

Well, math is hard.

Leslie

Parks & Rec Quotes

I may not have won, but at least I didn't make any new friendships.

April [about the beauty pageant]

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April