Favorite Scrubs Quotes
Dr. Cox: Newbie, I always punch the tabs out of my tapes so there's no possible way they can be recorded over, so pa-lease tell you didn't use the tape that was already in the camera.
J.D.: Banana hammock.
Dr. Cox: So another words, there is no permanent historical record of the birth of my friend's baby?
J.D.: Well, you know, I think that the baby itself would serve as proof that, you know, born.
Dr. Cox: You don't understand what you've done. My ex-wife is probably going to hold this over my head so long that I doubt I'll ever see the sun again, and I liked the sun newbie. It make me hopeful.
J.D.: Well I was there so, you know, I could certainly jot down some of my feelings and impressions
Russel: Jambo doctors. That's Swahili for hello or good morning.
Turk: Oh is it really? I know what it means. I had a jambo juice this morning. A berry blast with echinacea boost. It was delicious. I'm going to live forever, you're gonna be dead. I'm gonna be alive! Alive!
Denise: Wow, sure you didn't get a fem boost in there? That was pretty catty.
Trey, you haven't even seen crazy yet. You feeling froggy? Then leap son.
Lucy
Elliot: Uh, Dr. Kelso! You're the Chief of Medicine, is there a special way to communicate with the nursing staff that I'm not getting?
Dr. Kelso: Well, uh, sugar won't work because they're already so sweet. Now, listen Dr...Whatever-the-hell-your-name-is, you tattled yesterday, I responded - I feel closer to you than ever, really - but the ramifications are yours. So don't try to drag me into your pathetic, whiny, little squabble with that God-awful bunch of malcontents. I hope you all kill each other! Have a great day, ladies
J.D.: ...And now, Mr. Mueller's doing so much better, I'm not even sure telling him the truth about his pancreatic cancer is even the best thing for him.
Dr. Cox: So, what you're saying is that you have a problem that is totally your problem, but you'd like to find a way to make that problem my problem. But here's the problem, Newbie: it's not my problem. So whatta you say we stop talking about the Janitor's junk; I'd like to hear nahsing about ze German; and don't even mention Tasty Coma Wife, even though I know she's on your mind.
Elliot: Sorry I'm late.
Todd: Hey, Elliot. Is it greasy outside?
J.D.: Oh, that is so stupid. Elliot, you look... smart.
Dr. Cox: Hello?
Elliot: Of course I'm smart - I'm a doctor!
Doug: "What's up, doc?" I just got it!
J.D.: Maybe that's why Danni wants to break up with me, she thinks I'm too smart!
Todd: You're dating a guy named Danny? Is he hot?
Gooch and I are going to hold off on the babies. We've only known each other a week. Plus, with all the cycling, apparently I've done a real number on my sperm
Ted
Elliot: J.D. was sitting in that exact chair when we had our third kiss
Kelso: Oh that is very romantic, I will try not to drill any more farts into it
Elliot: I've learned two things since I've been pregnant: ketchup on cereal is delicious and sometimes you need to be selfish.
Cox: You are the host of this party and to some extent the voice of your generation and while I sadly acknowledge that heralds the coming apocalypse, I do value your opinion on one thing in particular.
Cole: Wow, you're like Shakespeare, yo.
Cox: I am, I am like Shakespeare, yo
You can't just jump in front of golf carts, that's how gardeners die.
Cole
J.D. [about Cole's mother]: You're gonna hit that, aren't you?
Kelso: Like a big rig with no breaks.
