You have no idea how many times I've been out late and had to pass on my seventh drink. No more Mr. Responsible.

Kelso

Lucy, it's not cancer cancer. That kind of cancer is for uglies and people who put laptops on their balls.

Cole

Check it, I put orange soda in my IV bag, I'm like a hamster yo.

Cole

That's exactly what Trang needed. Driving back and forth in the parking lot, reinforcing every stereotype of Asian drivers.

Denise

Dr. Cox: Hey talking man baby, come here. I am parked in the ten minute parking zone.
Trang: You want me to move your car?
Dr. Cox: No, I love the space. What I want you to do is pull out of and then back into the space every ten minutes. If you get bored, here's a deck of cards and a ball.

Dr. Cox: Please forgive me, but since I had a vasectomy last year, nay two vasectomies, I feel... I feel I just have to ask. Did you cheat on me?
Jordan: No. And you know me; I always tell.
Dr. Cox: Ah that's true.

Elliot: Tell me every detail about the first date.
Kim: We went horseback riding on the beach.
Elliot: Ah yes, I have been on that date.
Kim: Oh really?
J.D.: What? I had a coupon.

(On the phone) No mom! Playpen and baby cage is not like "toe-may-toe toe-mah-toe."

Janitor

Why does your TV smell like doo-doo?

Turk
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