Scrubs Season 3 Quotes
Jordan: Uh, Perr, is making out with a stranger cheating?
Dr. Cox: Technically not if it's under ten seconds, dear.
Jordan: Ah, not worth it.
Elliot: I just love you so much.
Carla: I love you too!
Elliot: Even though I ripped off your sister's eyebrow?
Carla: That's okay... You know, this morning she actually said she was gonna look better than me!?
Elliot: Not anymore!
Carla: I want everyone to get along.
Elliot: (To J.D.) I hope you die.
Elliot: AFTER the wedding.
... Turk, Turk, Turk, Turk. I can't talk right now! I'm at your wedding.</i>
Turk: Hey. How's it going, Mr. Fitzpatrick?
Mr. Fitzpatrick: Actually, it's Father Fitzpatrick.
Carla: Could you do us a quick favor?
Turk: Why isn't the band playing?
Laverne: In a word? Shrimps. Nasty, one-day-old shrimp. The band got into 'em while we was waiting at the church for your sorry ass.
J.D.: You wore your janitor uniform to a wedding?
Janitor: No, I wasn't invited to the wedding. I just work here on weekends.
J.D.: Who's that?
Janitor: My date... Forks! Frannie! Forks! Forks!
J.D.: Are forks where the big money is?
Janitor: Forks and ladles.
I just wanna wish you two all the luck in the world because, you see, the key to marriage is... work.Dr. Kelso
J.D.: Ted! Can you play a little music for us, buddy?
Ted: It's gonna cost you double what you paid us for the church.
Turk: Here's twenty.
Ted: Aaaand, here's four back.
J.D.: Look, Elliot, just tell me what you want me to do and I'll do it.
Elliot: Go back three days and keep me from throwing away my life for you.
J.D.'s Narration: In that second, I knew how to make things right if I just had the time.
Carla: What do you mean you're gonna be late?
Carla: What did you say?
J.D.: Nothing, girl!
Turk: What do you mean, disaster? Honey, this is an amazing wedding! And I know what you're gonna say - we didn't actually get married. But you know what? Tonight, you and I, we're gonna rip it up. And then we're gonna hop on a plane to the Bahamas, where you and I can get married tomorrow amongst the fishes and mermaids and whatnot.
Carla: Turk, for the last time, mermaids aren't real!
Turk: I know what I saw!
Sean: Elliot, do you wanna get out of here?
Elliot: Sean, look, I don't know what J.D. told you, but... if we're gonna give this another try, you need to know that I didn't end things with you because I was freaking out about us living together. I did it because... J.D. and I have this history and... I actually thought he might be the one. But I just ended up getting my heart broken.
Sean: Sucks, doesn't it?