Shameless
Sundays 9:00 PM on ShowtimeShameless Season 1 Quotes
I bet it itches like you got crabs in there.
Frank [to lady in body cast]
I'm a 60-year-old lady with the vag of a newborn.
Fiona
Fiona: Debbie stole a baby; we have to figure out how to return it.
Lip: Why?
Fiona: It's Debbie.
Oh don't mind me, I accidentally took three of my pills instead of one.
Sheila
Frank: Beautiful day for a party!
Neighbors: It's for kids, Frank. No booze!
That's your teenage diseased mind talking. You tasted penii and now you're just crazy!
Sheila's husband
Do you know why doctors, lawyers and nurses are great liars? Because they lie to help people.
Steve
She was born with a large clitoris!
Frank
I also danced with Cab Calloway, he had the first colored penis I ever kissed.
Fake Aunt Ginger
Well if you need me, I'll be in the bushes across the street stalking you.
Steve
I saw how you looked at Steve like a d-o-g in heat.
Veronica
Holy shit, you popped his cherry? And how was the 30 seconds of bliss.
Veronica
