South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Quotes
What you're looking at there is a Jewpacabra. It's like a sasquatch, only more elusive, more ferocious, and a little more greedy.
Cartman
Mr. Billings: What are the chances that Jewpacabra is real?
Peters: I'm estimating around .000000001%.
Mr. Billings: I can't afford to take that chance.
You can't scare a Jewpacabra! Don't forget Butters, we're dealing with a creature that drinks blood, hides in the night, and has no belief in the divinity of Christ.
Cartman
And so in the face of war, a little boy reminds us all what being human really means. The message is unclear, but it doesn't matter as long as you give the audience a song, celebrity bashing, and Republican presidential candidates dancing around with boobs. It's called pandering.
Newscaster
Son: What are those boys doing, Daddy?
Father: Oh, I think they're Faith Hilling, Bobby. It's a little before your time
Son: How droll.
Saying something is so 2000 and anything is so 2009, you asswipe!
Cartman
How can we be passé, we're only in 4th grade.
Kyle
There are only 3 approved memes. Peace sign, bunny ears, fake weiner.
Educational Video
We got crappy jewelry, now all we need are some old people.
Cartman
You may suck our collective balls, sir.
Cartman
You should be saving it for when you die. That's our money.
Randy
You can always sue somebody.
Lawyer
