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Michael: Very nice!
Darryl: Not bad, huh?
Michael: A real hoop dream story you got there.

She should go home. It's not the end of the world. We'll go on a date next week. She's still gonna like me in a week. Right...?

Andy

Oscar: I have a question.
Michael: [whispering to Jo] Oscar, homosexual accountant.

Angela: Hey! Are you sick?
Erin: Oh, no, I just have a little indigestion.
Angela: In your nose.
Erin: Yes.

When you work for Sabre only one thing matters. And I don't care if you're a loser, orrrrr you practice bestiality. If Jo likes you, you are in. And I .... am in.

Michael

I'm a little sick but I don't want to miss my date with Andy. I'll get better. Whenever I get sick it goes away within a few hours. Except once when I was in the hospital, from age three to six.

Erin

Dwight: I'll tell you what happened to me. I didn't see my father for the first two years of my life. I thought my mother was my father, and my wet nurse was my mother.
Jim: Well that's a common mistake.
Dwight: Turned out fine for me. But Mose. Same story... Different. Ending.

Dwight: Ah, that baby is just discovering the whole wide world right now.
Jim: It's pretty amazing.
Dwight: What up is, what down is, who mom is. Who dad is. It must be tough being here with all that going on.
Jim: Oh it's tough being here for a lot of reasons.
Dwight: I mean, you're here at work, the baby thinks that the refrigerator is its father.
Jim: Is that what happened to you?

Erin and I have our first date tonight. And it has to be perfect. Why? Because according to How I Met Your Mother, that's the date that your kids are going to wait patiently to hear about and you'd better have a good story to tell them.

Andy

Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumbass have been away on maternity leave. But now Tweedle Dumbass is back and we have a problem. Yes, getting hooked on Megadesk was my own damn fault. But [sighs] I don't care about assigning blame. All I care about, is Megadesk. That is all I care about. Getting. More. Megadesk.

Dwight

Meredith: Stop fighting! Just on St. Patrick's Day okay? Just one, perfect day a year. No hassles. No problems. No kids.
Ryan: Why no kids?
Kelly: Yeah where are your kids?
Meredith: Nope. Uh uh. Not today!

Do I really wanna turn out like Gabe? 26. Single. Tied to my desk. No life no family. I want to have been married by the time I would've turned thirty. That's just... that's just depressing.

Michael
Displaying quotes 121 - 132 of 419 in total

The Office Season 6 Quotes

If onlys and justs were candies and nuts, then everyday would be un de donkfest!

Dwight

If this were Russia, yeah sure. Everyone would go to one Santa, and there would be a line around the block and once you sat on her lap and she'd ask you what you wanted, you would say probably "freedom." At which point the KGB would arrest you and send you to Siberia. It's a good thing Russia doesn't exist anymore.

Michael