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A town car is something a company sends when they are in trouble. A limo is something they send when there is cause for celebration. In this case I believe they are celebrating ... me.

Michael

Alan Grant, the CEO, of the company, if title's important to you, has personally invited moi, to go to New York, to the shareholders meeting. And sit up on the stage with the board of directors and at some point they are going to introduce me as... the most successful branch manager that have had. And then Michael Scott turns and waves to the crowd. And the crowd goes wild.

Michael

I am not going to "do" the "twirl," alright? It's not even a twirl, it's a spin. [pauses] I might do the spin.

Michael

Pam: Don't do the twirl.
Phyllis: Lose the twril.
Dwight: Twirl sucks!
Kevin: Michael, I hated the twirl.
Andy: Hate the twirl!
Michael: Okay, obviously I'm not going to do the twirl. I only did it because I nailed the wave.
Phyllis: Yeah, good. Don't do it.

Dwight: What kind of mileage does this baby get?
Erin: It's like what high school kids take to prom on TV shows.
Oscar: So typical of management to spend money on this. Ugh, what a bunch of boobs.
Michael: Hate to break it to you Oscar, but some of us like boobs.
Dwight: Calves. Calves all the way.

Oscar: I just want to take this stupid board of directors by their necks. This. Is. So. Simple!
Andy: Yeah. Well you should do that. Get in line.
Oscar: Oh what a great idea, and lose my job. No thank you.
Andy: Look. Do you want to be able to tell your grandkids you stood up for yourself, during America's biggest financial crisis?
Dwight: How is he going to have grandkids.

I was hoping to lob Michael a softball question early. I wanted to swing by the garment district; pick up a few crates of my shirts. I got a shirt guy.

Dwight

Pam: I can't really imagine you yelling at anyone.
Jim: Oh I yell. You've heard me yell.
Pam: Oh okay. I've heard you exclaim? Like, the time you said, "Hey look! We parked over here!"
Jim: Well that was apple-picking day. There was no need to yell that day. I was just excited to find the car. Perfect end to a perfect day.
Pam: Well. You'll figure it out.

Jim: I gotta make an example out of him. Should I just fire him?
Pam: Can you actually fire people?
Jim: To be honest I don't know. But maybe I could just yell at him in front of people.

Michael: Alright. Well, I know a guy. This Mexican guy, he's a math wiz. He knows economics as well as he knows bullfighting and I am going to call in a little favor.
David: No-no-no-no, don't call anybody, Michael.
Michael: Well I'm texting him, so.
David: Please do not text anybody now, Michael.

Michael: Well. That was a waste of a text. Let's get down to brass tacks. I think that we might be in trouble. We don't seem to have a plan, so I'm thinking I go down there maybe rattle off a few jokes. The Congressman could follow?
Alan: He's our best manager? Where's the off button on this moron?
Michael: Uhh. I'm not a moron. Time after time, my branch, leads in sales. I have personally won over 17 Dundie awards so I am not a moron. And, I'm just trying to help, you know? So... you're the moron.

Alright. We are gonna ... we are gonna go out there, during this break, and we are gonna come back with a plan. We're gonna come back with a plan for you. It's a 45-day plan. 45 days! To get us back, on track. 45 points! It's a 45-day, 45-point, one point per day. We get 45 points, we're back in business! [cheers] And you can take that to the bank! And limo lady! We are going completely carbon-neutral! [more cheers] I love you New York! You! You!

Michael
Displaying quotes 229 - 240 of 419 in total

The Office Season 6 Quotes

If onlys and justs were candies and nuts, then everyday would be un de donkfest!

Dwight

Jim is my enemy. But it turns out that Jim is also his own worst enemy. And the enemy of my enemy is my friend. So Jim, is actually my friend. But, because he is his own worst enemy, the enemy of my friend is my enemy so actually Jim is my enemy. But-

Dwight