I would like to introduce you to a man who needs no introduction, probably because most of you have DONE IT WITH HIM. Just kidding. He wouldn't be interested in any of you.

Michael

I got a couple love bumps on my ding dong, so... game over.

Todd Packer

Dwight: Who is Justice Beaver?
Jim: It's... a crime-fighting beaver.

I think the ants are waking up — they need to start farming soon!

Erin

So something good happening to Stanley is crazy now.

Stanley

Ryan: This isn't the U.S. government.
Kelly: What are you referencing?
Ryan: Everything... everything.

We can't just sit around waiting for Creed to die.

Michael

I have very little patience for stupidity.

Kevin

Kevin will be eaten. Pam will be taken slave. Jim will be made a Warlord's jester. Meredith will be okay.

Dwight

I'm sorry I called you a pain in the ass. I'm angry and I love you.

Michael

If doing "The Scarn" is gay, then I'm the biggest queer on earth!"

Todd Packer

Goldenface: Sorry about your friend, Scarn.
Michael Scarn: The joke's on you, Goldenface. That man's a wanted animal rapist.

The Office Season 7 Quotes

A little cover up on your adam's apple will make it appear smaller, which will make you look less like a transvestite.

Michael (to Gabe)

Yes, I have a dream... I want to own a decommissioned lighthouse. And I want to live at the top. And nobody knows I live there. And there's a button I can press and launch that lighthouse into space.

Stanley