The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXPopular The Simpsons Quotes
Ned: Come on Homer, I'm insisting on a fisting.
Smithers: What's this about a fisting?
Ned: I want you to punch me in the eye. If you do, then we're even according to Exodus, Leviticus, and Matthew.
Homer: You went and hired a law firm, eh. That's pretty aggressive.
Edna: I know you feel guilty about coldcocking Homer.
Ned: Please don't use that word in bed.
Waiter: I hope you are enjoying your sushi.
Marge: It's as yummy as your poorly produced local commercial says.
The most romantic part of this was the hold music when I made the reservation.
Marge
Marge, I thought this was an innocuous lunch, but it's become terribly ocuous.
Homer
Homer: Listen, we swore we'd never go to sleep angry at each other.
Marge: I'm not going to sleep.
Homer: Well you didn't have two beers with your lunch.
Accidental motherhood is the best thing that can happen to a woman.
Marge
Just call me Borders Books cause I'll always be here.
Homer
Hey those Yelp reviews don't write themselves. Did you know a well-placed one-star could destroy a "Mom and Pop" hardware in nothing flat?
Homer
Patty: So, now you're going to get hit on by every loser in town.
Selma: And this town has losers like Mexico has headless corpses.
Yeah, I always go with three, the number of brothers and sisters I, uh, Hunger Gamed in the womb.
Moe
