The Simpsons

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The simpsons
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Homer: This is Thanksgiving, so glue friendly or else I'll take away the glue and then nobody will have any glue to glue with!
Lisa: Dad, this isn't about glue, it's about territoriality. He only wants the glue because I'm using it.
Bart: Oh yeah, prove it (she hands him the glue) Hey man, I don't want your stupid glue.

See Maggie, those silver-and-blue guys are the Dallas Cowboys. They're Daddy's favorite team. And he wants them to lose by less than five and a half points. Understand?

Homer

At the risk of losing my voice, let me just say one more thing... (Everyone listens carefully) ...I'm sorry I came.

Jacqueline

Let's go! If I'm not back at the home by nine they declare me legally dead and collect my insurance!

Grampa

Marge: Now we can blame him for everything!
Homer: It's your fault I'm bald.
Abe: It's your fault I'm old.
Maggie: It's your fault I can't talk!
Uncle Sam: It's your fault America has lost its way!
Everyone: It's all your fault! It's all your fault! It's all your fault!

Oh we have lots of names for these people. Bums, deadbeats, losers, scums of the earth, we'd like to sweep these people into the gutter, or if already in the gutter, to some other out of the way place. Oh we have our reasons. They're depressing, their ragged clothes, they're crazy, they smell bad. So every year on one conscience salving day, we toss these people a bone. A turkey bone. And that's supposed to make it all better.

Kent Brockman

Patty: When is that boy going to apologize?
Selma: He sure is stubborn.
Grampa: Homer was never stubborn. He always folded instantly over everything. It was as if he had no will of his own. Isn't that true, Homer?
Homer: Yes, dad!

Lady: Hey, you gotta be eighteen to sell your blood, lets see some ID.
Bart: Here you go, doll face!
Lady: Okay, Homer, just relax.

Hello, operator! Give me the number for 911!

Homer

Marge: Mom, you made it! How are you?
Jacqueline: I have laryngitis. It hurts to talk, so I'll just say one thing: You never do anything right.

Grampa: What's your hurry?
Homer: This place is depressing.
Grampa: Hey!I live here!
Homer: I'm sure it's a blast once you get used to it.

Bart: Who the hell is that?
Homer: Bullwinkle.
Bart: Who? Wait a minute, who's that?
Homer: Underdog, don't you know anything?
Bart: It wouldn't hurt them to use some cartoons made in the last fifty years.
Homer: Bart, this is the tradition. If you build a balloon for every flash in the pad cartoon character, you'll turn the parade into a farce.
(Bart balloon shows up on the television)

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 16 in total

The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 7 Quotes

Homer: Alright Bart, that's it! Go to your room! Now!
Bart: Okay, I'll take some white meat and some stuffing to go and send in the pumpkin pie in about twenty minutes.
Homer: I said now!
Bart: Mom do I have too?
Marge: Yes you do! I hope your happy Bart! You ruined Thanksgiving!

Hello, operator! Give me the number for 911!

Homer