The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 5: "Treehouse of Horror IV"" Quotes
(Homer is being sucked into Hell)
Marge: Homer, did you eat that donut?!
- Permalink: Homer, did you eat that donut?! No.
Blackbeard: (looking at Homer and Marge's wedding picture) Arrgh! This be some sort of treasure map!
Benedict Arnold: Give me that, you idiot! You can't read!
- Permalink: Arrgh! This be some sort of treasure map! Give me that, you id...
Vampire Burns: (On the intercom) Come in, come in. Ah, more victims for the vicious undead.
Smithers: Uh, you're supposed to let go of the button.
Vampire Burns: Well son of a bi--(lets go of the button)
- Permalink: Come in, come in. Ah, more victims for the vicious undead. Uh,...
Marge: I think there is something a little off about him.
Homer: Yeah, his hairdo is so queer.
Vampire Burns: I heard that!
Homer: It was the boy!
- Permalink: I think there is something a little off about him. Yeah, his h...
This cape is giving me a rash.Vampire Grampa
- Permalink: This cape is giving me a rash.
My mule wouldn't walk in the mud. So I had to put seventeen bullets in him.Groundskeeper Willie
- Permalink: My mule wouldn't walk in the mud. So I had to put seventeen bull...
I was watching Matlock in a bar last night. The sound wasn't on but I got the gist of it.Lionel Hutz
- Permalink: I was watching Matlock in a bar last night. The sound wasn't on ...
This chair be high, says I.Blackbeard
- Permalink: This chair be high, says I.
Lisa, vampires are make-believe, just like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos.Homer
- Permalink: Lisa, vampires are make-believe, just like elves, gremlins, and ...
Principal Skinner: Pull, Willie, pull!
Groundskeeper Willie: I'm doin' all the pulling, you blouse-wearing poodle-walker!
- Permalink: Pull, Willie, pull! I'm doin' all the pulling, you blouse-wear...
Homer: Ahh! Super Fun Happy Slide!
Lisa: No Dad!
Homer: OhhI guess killing will be fun enough.
- Permalink: Ahh! Super Fun Happy Slide! No Dad! OhhI guess killing will ...
Lionel Hutz: First, some ground rules: Number one, we get bathroom breaks every half-hour.
Devil Flanders: Agreed! Number two, the jury will be chosen by me!
Lionel Hutz: Agreed. No, wait--
Devil Flanders: Silence! I give you the Jury of the Damned! Benedict Arnold, Lizzie Borden, Richard Nixon--
Nixon: But I'm not dead yet! In fact, I just wrote an article for Redbook.
Devil Flanders: Hey, listen; I did a favor for you!
Nixon: Yes, master.
Devil Flanders: John Wilkes Booth, Blackbeard the Pirate, John Dillinger, the starting line-up of the 1976 Philadelphia Flyers!
- Permalink: Number one, we get bathroom breaks every half-hour. Agreed! Nu...
Lisa: Grampa's a vampire?
Bart: We're all vampires.
Lisa: But no. We killed Mr. Burns.
Homer: You have to kill the head vampire.
Lisa: You're the head vampire?
Marge: No, I'm the head vampire. (Lets out an evil laugh)
Marge: Well I do have a life outside this house, you know.
- Permalink: Grampa's a vampire? We're all vampires. But no. We killed Mr...