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Bart: I just had a vision of my own horrible fiery death.
Lisa: And?

Grampa: Quick! We have to kill the boy!
Marge: How did you know he's a vampire?
Grampa: He's a vampire? Ahhh!

(Homer squeezes bull horn in Bart's ear)
Bart: Ahhhhhh!
Homer: Hey Marge, I found all this stuff at the dock. It was just sitting in some guy's boat.

Bart! How many times have I told you not to bite your sis Hey, wait a minute! You are a vampire!


Homer, today Bart's a vampire. Tomorrow he could be smoking!


It was so nice of Mr. Burns to invite us to his country home in...Pennsylvania!


(Homer is being sucked into Hell)
Marge: Homer, did you eat that donut?!
Homer: No.

Blackbeard: (looking at Homer and Marge's wedding picture) Arrgh! This be some sort of treasure map!
Benedict Arnold: Give me that, you idiot! You can't read!

Vampire Burns: (On the intercom) Come in, come in. Ah, more victims for the vicious undead.
Smithers: Uh, you're supposed to let go of the button.
Vampire Burns: Well son of a bi--(lets go of the button)

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