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The-simpsons

The most romantic part of this was the hold music when I made the reservation.

Marge

Waiter: I hope you are enjoying your sushi.
Marge: It's as yummy as your poorly produced local commercial says.

Burns: How much for your entire collection?
Comic Book Guy: Um, the speed of light expressed in dollars.
Burns (to Smithers): Just give him Faraday's constant.

Who could have shoved eggs up our brass?

Martin

Egg don't belong in a chicken's eye. It belongs in her pee-poo-birth-hole.

Cletus

Bart must not be judged by these kids. But by a jury...of kids, mostly these kids...there's only so many kids.

Lisa

Pass the gravy, Gloria All-Wrong.

Bart

Hibbert:You may never see a film in 3D again. Hehehe.
Homer: But the storytelling is finally catching up to the technology.

Lisa: Why does someone become a bully?
Jimbo: Neglect.
Dolph: Abuse.
Kearney: I'm a Cubs fan.

Edna: I know you feel guilty about coldcocking Homer.
Ned: Please don't use that word in bed.

Ned: I want you to punch me in the eye. If you do, then we're even according to Exodus, Leviticus, and Matthew.
Homer: You went and hired a law firm, eh. That's pretty aggressive.

Ned: Come on Homer, I'm insisting on a fisting.
Smithers: What's this about a fisting?

Displaying quotes 97 - 108 of 3391 in total

The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

Homer: Aw, twenty dollars? I wanted a peanut!
Homer's Brain: Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts.
Homer: Explain how!
Homer's Brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services.

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