Thursdays 10:00 PM on FX
Wilfred

Wilfred: Please tell me that donkey faced thing with the braces is not the chick you're going out with.
Ryan: She doesn't have braces.
Wilfred: Yeah you just can't see 'em, because they're probably on her legs. How do you think she supports that massive donkey face?

Catherine: Indian Chief, woo woo woo woo. That was a little racist but it was fun.
Wilfred: How is that racist? Indians do that all the time.

I hope you're proud of yourself Ryan. I'm gonna be up all night licking Jenna's tears. Do you know what all that sodium's gonna do to my blood pressure?

Mrs. Newman is my slave name. You can call me Catherine.

Catherine

I remember you, Ryan. Memory is like the Packers when they're behind by two touchdowns in the fourth quarter...it comes back.

What? You think you can do better than undies on the face?

Ryan, anger is like herpes. You're not meant to keep it to yourself.

Wilfred: You're not crazier than anybody else.
Ryan: Said the dog to the man.

Ryan: Another Hillary Swank dream?
Wilfred: She was wearing a g-string in this one. Ryan it was so real.

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