Phil: We're like two peas in a pod, or Siamese twins, a snake with two heads!
Claire: They've actually been all those things for Halloween.


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Modern Family Season 1 Episode 21 Quotes

Was that the alarm? Has our perimeter been breached?

Manny

Phil: Dad, what's up?
Frank: Nothing, but these boxers are starting to ride high.
Phil: I'm in no mood for jokes... although that was a good one. You still got it.