Blair finds Cyrus preparing for their Passover Seder dinner that night, and reminds him she won't be coming, as she has an important wedding rehearsal for Nate's cousin Tripp to attend.
Cyrus offers to get her an interview at NYU, but she scoffs at that, and heads off to see Nate and his wealthy relatives, who she believes are her ticket to social-climbing stardom.
Meanwhile, Chuck welcomes Serena back from Spain, by telling her about all the sex he's been having. Serena says nothing happened in Spain but quiet lounging with Poppy and Gabriel, but Chuck asks how come he saw Poppy at a bar in NYC last week then. What's she hiding now?
On the steps of the church, Nate tells Blair that he got into Columbia, all on his own no less. He is torn because Yale may be the better school, but his grandfather helped him get in there, and he's determined not to owe anyone any favors. Something is bothering Nate.
Maureen, Tripp's fiancee, tells Blair that the prestigious Whitney junior committee thinks she's too new on the scene to socialize. Ouch.
Jenny is at home working on a plant science project with her new friend (and crush) named Wes. Rufus laments not having that much money, and Dan worries that he will never be able to afford Yale without financial aid.
Jenny says that Wes's mother owns a catering company, and that maybe he can work there for some extra money. That will give her a reason to ask him to dinner, for being cool and getting Dan a job. She makes the call.
Dan agrees to do it, but out of pride, he doesn't want his dad to know.
In the cathedral, while Nate rehearses for the wedding, Nate's grandfather sits next to Blair as she watches the rehearsal, and asks her to help him convince Nate that Yale is the appropriate choice.
The grandfather says he'll call one of his friends on the committee to get Blair in if she does his bidding. She reluctantly makes the deal.
As he continues to hilariously prepare dinner and get on everyone's nerves, Cyrus gets a phone call from Serena. She says she needs a lawyer.
Lily is pissed that Serena ran away to Spain, and says she is back to the "Old Serena" now. Serena apologizes, but she's still grounded. L
Serena calls Blair, who says she won't be home all day because she's "in" with the Vanderbilts and set for life.
Point being, B still isn't going to the Seder at her own apartment.
The Waldorf Seder, of course, is Dan's first catering gig, which he learns when Eleanor recognizes him outside their building. Dan tells Eleanor he can't serve food to Blair, but E says B isn't even going to show, and she offers to double his fee, so he very reluctantly agrees.
Blair tries, half-heartedly, to talk Nate into Yale, but he is dead set on Columbia. After tonight, N says he's done with his family - Tripp told him something at lunch that we don't know yet, but clearly hit close to home.
Serena heads over to Blair's because Blair isn't there, and to see Cyrus.
Talking to Serena, Cyrus says he will "look into the legalities" of what she needs ... to which Serena says she can't just tell her mom that she got married in Spain and needs a quickie annulment.
Dan, of course, is also there. He walks in and overhears. He is not happy.
Serena explains that Poppy and Gabriel got in a fight and Poppy bolted the country, and then she and Gabriel got married - she thinks - after a wild, drunken night out.
Serena then discovers that Dan is there because he is a cater waiter, which doesn't help his self-esteem after what he's already heard.
At the rehearsal dinner, Blair asks what's going on with him, and he says it's fine and walks away. The grandfather walks up to B and asks what's wrong with Nate. She has no response.
Rufus and Lily arrive at the Seder - Lily invited herself to introduce Rufus to Alan Levy, a snobby art collector who is going to be there.
Serena is surprised to see Rufus and Lily, and lies and says that Blair invited her, and she invited Dan. Eleanor is confused but tells Serena to stay away.
She barks orders at Dan and tells him to make himself presentable. Rufus is not aware that this is because he's being paid to wait on Eleanor, and is therefore a little confused, but he rolls with it.
Jenny and Wes are playing Monopoly at the VDW's. Chuck comes in making out with some girl and immediately heads to the bedroom.
The Seder begins, and Eleanor screams at Dan to get the food while Serena tries again to apologize to him for getting married.
Blair asks Tripp what he said to Nate, and Tripp tells Blair she should be good to him. Then Nate's best man toast begins.
He gives a speech talking about the importance of family to his grandfather - who it turns out turned Nate's father to the feds. Wow. He then tells Tripp to watch his back. Crickets.
Back at the Seder, Gabriel barges in to the apartment looking for Serena, and Dan answers the door. Dan drags her out of the ceremony and Gabriel demands an explanation for her ditching him.
She tells him that Dan is her boyfriend, and they are in love.
Dan plays along, but Gabriel isn't buying it.
Eleanor comes out looking for Dan and meets Gabriel. Eleanor invites him to join the dinner. The lies and confusing story lines are really piling up at this point!
The grandfather tells Blair that she has five minutes to fix this, and before she takes a moral stand she should remember what's at stake.
As Cyrus tries to accomplish religious rituals, Lily starts to ask Gabriel about Spain, and Serena interrupts. The art collector asks snobby questions at Rufus. Serena insists that Dan sit down, and Serena and Dan hold hands.
Back at the VDW's, Chuck and the girl are kissing in bed, and just then Chuck recognizes her kisses from last year.
They've had sex before.
Disgusted, he walks out and gets a drink, where sees Jenny and Wes. He interrupts them, and Jenny tells Chuck that he doesn't have the right to mess with everyone's lives.
She never told her dad about the party when he tried to take advantage of her on the roof. If she did, Rufus would make Lily kick out Chuck, leaving him with no human contact he doesn't pay for.
Jenny and Wes leave, and a saddened Chuck kicks out his date.
Nate asks Blair if he made a mistake, but she has his back this time, and says he did great. She says she's going to get her coat so they can go.
Just then the grandfather walks up and tells Nate that yes, he did turn in his father, but only after he encouraged the Captain to turn himself in for his own good, and only as a last resort to protect Nate and his mother.
Nate says he just wants people to be honest with him, so the grandfather agrees, and tells him that Blair was using him to get on that committee.
Back at the Seder, everyone is confused about the Dan and Serena thing, and then they figure out that he's the waiter. He admits that he's not back together with Serena, but he does care about her.
Nate confronts Blair about her motives. She admits that she agreed to do the grandfather's bidding, but didn't go through with it.
He thought she changed, but he was wrong. He storms off.
Lily accuses Serena of being her "old" self again, and Serena is mad that Lily thinks she is a bad person just because she does bad things all the time and doesn't want to be all good. She wants to find a balance.
Lily says she could never think of Serena as a bad person, and, oh yeah, she got into Brown. OMG! Yay! Still unaware that her daughter is supposedly a wife, Lily asks what S will do about Gabriel, and S says it's a mess.
Gabriel has apparently left, but Serena chases after him. He informs Serena on the street that they aren't married, so now she likes him again.
Gabriel asks if Dan was her boyfriend, and she says no. They kiss on the street. Blair walks up, interrupts, and hugs Serena and cries.
Nate knocks on Chuck's door, and they share a drink. Nate says he was stupid to think she would change, and Chuck says yes... it's stupid for him to want her to be anything other than what she is.
And he says she is changing, because she chose Nate over him. She needs someone to believe in her. Nate offers to go get them a refill.
Rufus comes in and says that he sold a painting, and might sell the gallery. When he started out he was selling affordable art, but he doesn't love it anymore. What's next? Who knows. But he'll find out.
Blair regrets losing Nate, and thinks she deserves to be alone. She asks S about Gabriel. Serena says it's a long story.
Eleanor tells Blair that someone is waiting downstairs.
Chuck is shown looking for Nate, but he's gone. He gets another drink. J comes back, and she says her date was great.
Chuck tells her he deeply regrets what he did that night.
Blair apologizes to Cyrus, and she asks if he can forgive her. He says yes. She asks if there's still a chance he can phone it in over at NYU, and he says he can get her an interview, but she has to close the deal.
Nate comes out and says looks like they will both be in the city next year. She rushes to him, says she is sorry, and hugs him. They kiss.
Serena calls and gets Gabriel's voicemail.
S says she's glad that he came back for her, and hangs up. Over where the phone is, Poppy picks it up and looks at Gabriel. She tells him to tell her everything.
I don't even know how to say half the words in this prayer book named after Joe Lieberman's wife.Eleanor
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[to Blair] When it comes to these things, it takes a while to start to matter.Maureen
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