It's all about Serena, Serena, Serena.
Blair is far from pleased that her BFF is now getting all the attention - from the clique at school and from the celebrity gossip magazines, which actually ran a picture of S and some girl named Poppy Lifton. But what really sets Blair off is a seating chart.
Eleanor put Blair (Leighton Meester) in charge of making the seating chart for her show at Fashion Week.
Queen B put her friends from school in the second row in order to try to win back their affection, assuming that B and Serena would be backstage helping Eleanor like they do every year. It's their tradition.
But Laurel says there are no socialites or celebrities in the front row and tells Eleanor that the press won’t cover her show unless she fills the seats with A-listers. That's when Jenny suggests that Eleanor rearrange the seats and place Serena (Blake Lively) in the front row with her new socialite friend Poppy.
Jenny has been lying to Rufus again, cutting school and working at the fashion house 24-7.
Well, once Blair learns Jenny switched the seating at Eleanor’s show, she’s furious and goes all the way to Brooklyn to tell Rufus how Jenny has been out of school for 10 days. You know, because Blair is nice and wanted to "check up on her." She's so caring.
Meanwhile, a new writing mentor tells Dan his stuff sucks, that he needs to stop writing about a whiny guy from Brooklyn who has girl problems and "get out of his comfort zone." To accomplish that, Dan goes to the hotel and asks Chuck Bass to hang out. Really.
On their guys night out, Dan gets wasted and an annoyed Chuck kicks him out of the limo at the end of the night with no shoes. In Manhattan. When his mentor tells him that story is lame, Dan tries to befriend Chuck - who he calls "Charlie Trout" in his stories, BT-Dubs - a second time, and it becomes a little more interesting.
At one of Chuck's seedy clubs of choice, he tries to pick up a prostitute who it turns out is not a prostitute. The girl's boyfriend gets angry at this and stars to go after Chuck, but Dan lays him out. Woo hoo Dan!
This lands them in jail, however. Chuck thanks Dan for getting his back and tells Dan about his past. Chuck, who has been pining for his dad all night for some reason, thinks Bart hates him because his mother died while giving birth to him. It's really very sad.
A minute later, Chuck’s lawyer gets him out of jail and the guard hands him Dan’s belongings by mistake. That's when Chuck finds Dan’s notes about the story and gets hella pissed, walking back to the cell to threaten Dan and insist that the story about his mom was just BS.
Dan eventually gets bailed out and decides that he doesn’t want to exploit people in order to be a good writer, telling off (and cutting ties with) his new mentor. That makes two blown Yale recommendations for young Mr. Humphrey in just five episodes!
Speaking of Bart Bass, he finally returns! We also learn that Lily van der Woodsen posed nude (gulp) back in the day for some big-name photographer.
She has been trying to hunt down the picture so she can display it in their apartment, which she's got her art dealer decorating like a madwoman.
It turns out Bart already bought the portrait at an auction, though, and L could not be more thrilled, assuming her new husband wants to present it to her as a gift. But really Bart bought just bought it because it could be considered incriminating. He hired someone to dig into Lily's past.
Lily demands to see everything he found out, insisting that she is not one to hide from who she is. However, Bart hands her an envelope and says that she probably wouldn’t the kids to see what’s inside.
Lily is completely shocked when she opens the envelope, but we can't see its contents.
Rufus makes it clear to Jenny that she has to go to school, going so far as to beg the Headmistress to give her a second chance if J apologizes to her in person. However, J tells her she will not be coming back to school.
On to Fashion Week.
Doing anything to sabotage her friend (and her mom), Blair has switched the chart back so that Serena is in the fourth row, far from new pal Poppy.
When Poppy and Serena arrive, S gets pissed at B and they nearly have it out then and there. But Eleanor comes in and settles it with Jenny’s help, as S is put back in the front row and B is feeling distraught.
Blair's not done, though. She tries to ruin J yet again when she tells all of the models that they were overbooked and can could go home.
It was J’s job to make sure all of the models were ready to walk the runway, of course. But Jenny doesn’t panic. She asks Serena and her friends to walk the runway instead!
At first, Serena didn't want to because she didn't want to upset Blair, but then she has a heart to heart with Poppy, who says S should stop trying to hide who she really just to please Blair.
Serena agrees to go ahead and walk in the show and - one last time - Blair is hell bent on wrecking everything when she hands her her dress to wear down the catwalk. The problem? It's a dress Jenny made, not Eleanor.
When Jenny finds out, she freaks and confronts Blair, who finally admits how bad she feels that Serena is usurping her power. Jenny actually seems to understand what Blair is going through.
Eleanor is about to rip Jenny’s head off for sabotaging her show (she thinks Jenny put her own dress on Serena on purpose) but Blair comes to the rescue and tells her mom that Jenny saved the day.
To top things off, the press apparently loved Jenny’s dress and said it was the perfect finale to the designer's collection. Eleanor Waldorf and the rest of the group then sing Jenny’s praises.
Rufus is irate after hearing from the Headmistress what Jenny did. Storming into the fashion show, he confronts her, but she coolly tells him she’s not going to go back to school and is going to keep working for Eleanor.
That's pretty much that.
Finally, Blair tries to apologize to Serena, but S refuses to accept. Serena stands up for herself and calls Blair out on her crap, but also comes off a bit conceited herself, which Blair calls her out on. This is a feud that may not end anytime soon from the looks of it.
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Dan: I know... we don't like each other. You think I'm a boring, sheltered nobody.
Chuck: I don't think of you.
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It's like the plague. Only instead of vermin on my doorstep, I get the human being. Beat it, Humphrey. My sister doesn't dig stalkers.Chuck
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