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After trying to get intimate with his girlfriend, Lyndsay, but getting continually disturbed by her teenage son, Eldritch, Alan decides to take her to a hotel. It turns out it's her period and Alan eats a few too many oysters and things don't go exactly as planned, but the two seem to have a good time anyways.
Meanwhile, Charlie orders the girlfriend experience from an Asian prostitute, requesting her to do such things as fight with him first so they can have makeup sex after.