Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCFavorite Claire Dunphy Quotes
Phil: It's nice to see you Gloria. [Hugs Gloria]
Gloria: Two times today.
Phil: Okay. [Goes in for another hug]
Claire: Uh, Phil, she means we've seen them two times today
Wait! There's the esteem-building parent right there. Wait! I think I hear future Lily sending us a message from her stripper pole. Thanks gay-dad dads; this dance is for you!
Cameron
Claire: Look at them: A minute ago they were babies, and now their driving, and soon we'll all be dead.
If I say something that everybody else is thinking, does that make me a mean person? Or, does it make me a brave person, one who is courageous enough to stand up and say something, behind someone's back to a ten-year-old?
Claire: I'll be upstairs, Clive, don't take too long.
Phil: I never do.
Claire: Oh, go figure. A teenage boy doesn't want to hang out with his girlfriend's dad.
Phil: I thought we were past all that. I'm all about taking it to the next level.
Claire: Really? I thought you were all about keeping it real.
Phil: Yes, but the whole point of keeping it real is so you can take it to the next level. Did you really not know that?
Claire: I assure you, you are fine.
Phil: That's very comforting coming from a marketing major at a party school.
Phil [about Luke]: I'm telling you that kid is a genius, there's a rainmaker
Claire: Why is your iPod in your mouth?
Luke: I'm charging it
Claire: Alex. Alex!
If Hannibal Lecter and Freddy Krueger had a lovechild, he would be afraid of our next-door neighbor.
Claire: We need a game plan, we need to map out exactly what we are going to say, because that is the only way I will be able to hold it together while our babies look at us with judgment and disgust.
Phil: That's how they always look at us.
Phil: How did Scout get your bra?
Claire: Well, we were out on a date, and he has a really nice car, so — how do you think? He got it from the laundry basket.
Phil: Hey momma bear, you okay?
Claire: Not with momma bear I'm not.
