The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSRajesh "Raj" Koothrappali Quotes
I had trouble putting it on and you tried to help and ... that's all she wrote.
You can't ruin a friendship with sex that's like trying to ruin ice cream with chocolate sprinkles.
Raj: To quote Shakespeare, "It is better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography."
Penny: Oh, you poor baby!
Raj: What's wrong with me, Penny?
Penny: Nothing! Nothing. You know, if we weren't friends - and you hadn't brought up that creepy pornography story - I'd be on you like the speed of light squared on matter to make energy.
Raj: Well, to paraphrase Shakespeare: It's better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography.
Penny: Oh... you poor baby.
Raj: What's wrong with me, Penny?
Penny: Nothing, nothing. You know, if we weren't friends - and you hadn't brought up that creepy pornography story - I'd be on you like the speed of light squared on matter to make energy.
Raj: Hey, you totally got that right. E = MC squared.
Penny: I listen. I have no idea what it means, but I listen.
Penny: Oh, okay, look. THIS. NEVER. HAPPENED. Do you understand me?
Raj: (nodding)
Penny: Really?! Still can't talk to me?!
Leonard: What are you doing here?
Raj: I was sleeping!
Leonard: In MY bed?
Raj: Well, I would have slept in my OWN bed, but it was being used to bring shame to my family....and the memory of Gene Roddenberry!
Raj: Can I bring girls here?
Leonard: You? Sure. Bring as many as you want.
Raj: Okay, deal.
Leonard: Just not against their will.
Come on, dude, I'm exhausted and Tyra Banks says the most important item in your makeup bag is a good night's sleep.
Rotting Zombie ... Sheldon's new Facebook photo!
She never even got to see my penis. Ta-da!
Nothing rhymes with orange. It's probably lonely.
Oh, Bernadette, please play my clarinet.
Raj's poem
