Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCModern Family Season 5 Quotes
He says the only tool you need is a sense of humor.
Luke [about Phil]
Gloria: This is fun for me. You're my stepdaughter.
Claire: I'm older than you.
Mitchell: You know I'm surprised this particular foursome doesn't hang out more, considering...
Alex: We're the cultured ones in this family?
I used to make stuff for Claire all the time. I think my artistry was what locked her down.
Phil
You know what a lot of girls don't do? Guys who take ceramics.
Jay
Unlike you, I don't need a reason to watch a bunch of guys run around in shorts.
Mitchell [to Jay]
I had a choice to make. Be the better dancer or the bigger man. So I stepped off the dance floor and made the obvious call. You wanna win over a crowd? Invite a lonely mom to dance. She never saw it coming and neither did he.
Cam
They say the greats never let anything affect their performance. Well maybe the greats never had a daughter who checked out during the third of five planned real time wardrobe changes. But I'm not gonna lie, it knocked me off my game.
Phil
Trust me, when I get done talking to her not only will she have confessed to the crime, I might even sell her a closet.
Jay
You know what I say, I might be coach but I like to travel first class!
Cam
Now there are pushy obnoxious moms, who try and get involved, nudge them towards one another...we mean well.
Claire
Ew it's so sad when parents try. My mom double pierced one of her ears and I'm like "Hello! You're 50."
Alex
