New Girl
Tuesdays 8:30 PM on FOXFavorite New Girl Quotes
Guess whose personalized condoms just arrived!
Schmidt
Nick: Get out, Schmidt.
Schmidt: I'm the only one who hasn't seen it!
Jess: You're too late. I'm in love. With Winston.
Winston: You know, it just got stuck up there so far, so quickly.
We sold our qualms. We used the profits to buy perfect bodies.
Schmidt
Schmidt: I don't know what is allowed in the cold-hearted Republic of Nick Miller, but I do know how I feel. And I know how much you love cookies. And I saw it there behind the glass and thought, "Nick Miller. I'm gonna buy that, man."
Nick: If I could give you that cookie back, I would. Nothing would make me happier than to throw it up, mash it into cookie shape, and shove it down your throat.
Schmidt: You want to mama-bird me the cookie?
Nick: That's not what I-
Schmidt: You want to mama-bird me the cookie. You're not mama-birdin' anybody anything!
Nick: Jess, you know I don't dance.
Jess: Oh but you didn't know I do this. I'm mime walking. I'm Mime-chael Jackson.
You're dating a stripper, I'm dating a tall handsome doctor. We're kinda living the dream.
Jess
Old Nick: Can I tell you something?
Nick: Not really.
Old Nick: I'm you, from the future.
Nick: Well, that's a first.
Any time a man wants to show a woman how to do something from behind it's just because he wants an excuse to get real close and breathe on her neck. Watch any sports movie.
Nick
Cece:Do you have any agave?
Schmidt: We might have some pressed lentils syrups in the mixin's cabinet.
Waitress: You're all on a date?
Nick: Yeah, we're her boyfriends. We're reverse Mormons - one guy just isn't enough for her.
I'm big in Japan — they call me Gigglebangs Riceball.
Jess
