Scream Queens Quotes
Chad Radwell, I promise to honor your death by dressing up on Halloween as Mrs. Chad Radwell and finding out who killed you. And if I die trying, I will meet you up in heaven, baby boy, at one of them no-tell motels and do whatever you want with all of this.
Denise
Are you upset, #5? Because as far as I can tell, I am the only one here showing even a modicum of anguish! I mean, did anyone else here think to change into a proper costume with a subtle Jackie Kennedy leitmotif to show the passing of Chad Radwell is a MAJOR event in our nation's history? No. Is anyone else so bereaved that they've lost control of their bladder and they've started relieving themselves in the potted plants in the hallway? No. In fact, is anyone here raging at the heavens by peeing in places you're not supposed to pee? No! So quit making this about you #5, because this is about me!
Chanel
Denise: Damn it, you homely bitch, tell us who the Green Meanie is before he kills again!
Hester: It's too late.
It's a 29 carat, internally flawless, fancy vivid diamond in the extremely rare whore cut, which is the preferred cut for mistresses of Russian billionaires.
Chanel
I don't want to hurt Chanel. Isn't that weird? I just want her to be happy, I want her to have a great wedding day. I don't want my worries about my future studliness to get in the way of her special day. Whatever happens down the road, I want this day to be for her. Maybe I almost love her, you know?
Chad
Chad: Chanel Oberlin, will you...
Chanel: Oh my god! Is this really happening?!
Chad: ... get your lawyers to look over this prenup?
Chanel: Are you asking me to marry you?
Chad: Oh, not really. No, I'll consider asking you to marry me once you sign the prenup. You're gonna want a whole legal team to look over this, there's a lot of stipulations and some pretty specific riders...
Chanel: Chad, I feel like I'm in a fairy tale. Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!
Chanel, I'm in love with you.
Chad
I'm Chad Radwell, and I always win. No matter what.
Chad
The next morning, I woke up on my back, covered in puke. And I realized, I did die. And now I'm cursed to walk the earth for all eternity. Like a Highlander.
Cassidy Cascade
Chad: Oh, that's great. Are we having a sperm-off?
Dr. Holt: No.
Chad: Oh, okay. Because, you know what? I would win. Because I banged both women in this room. With my sperm!
Chanel: Alright, let's get this body down to the meat locker.
Chanel #3: Last time we tried to hide a lot of bodies in the meat locker, like, every single one of them got stolen.
Alright, Green Meanie -- whoever you are -- let's go, bitch.
Zayday
