The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXPopular The Simpsons Quotes
Mapple Salesperson: The lightest, most desirable computer in the world, for the next three weeks - the Mapple Void.
Homer: I'll take it, provided you charge me for services that Google offers for free.
Grampa: And I created an alcoholic hippo.
Homer: You never showed it to me!
Grampa: A stupid alcoholic hippo!
Dream Apu: Homer, you do not yet understand the meaning of karma
Homer: But isn't karma just an expression of the dharma?
Dream Apu: That is beside the point, ok?
Lighten up, Marge. I take you to the Disneyland of me and you just want to go to the lost and found.
Homer
Now that's what I call looking out for number one.
Homer (on the Uralarm)
Attention lovers of free office supplies - come and steal things you can easily afford!
Homer
Moe: And that's that. Another story in the classic infallible three-act structure. Good enough for Aristotle, good enough for The Simpsons.
Lisa: Mr. Szyslak I have feeling there's going to be one more act to this story.
Moe: Well I'm not hanging around for that. Pfftt. Four acts.
I'm married to the sea, and I'm seeing two of the great lakes on the side. I won't say which ones but it's ERIE how SUPERIOR they are.
Sea Captain
Homer: People here do not respect boundaries.
Ned: Homer, did you just buckle your belt through my loop?
Hmmm...historically inaccurate.
Homer
Ned: Well sir, now we'll have an open marriage.
Edna: Um, you do know what that means?
Ned: No, but I"m sure Newt Gingrich wouldn't steer us wrong.
Man, soccer's even boring for the ball.
Moe
