The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 22 Quotes
After NAFTA, a lot of these jobs went to the South Pole.
Nelson
Lisa: You mean your gingerbread McMansion.
Homer: Show some respect, three gingerbread men died making that.
Moe: Pretty much if it moves, you can bet on it.
Homer: What about the Detroit Lions?
Moe: Hey, lay off Detroit. Them people is livin' in Mad Max times.
My mom ran off with my birthday clown!
Nelson
He's a homing pigeon. He comes home. Unless you wanna spring for a limo.
Pigeon Owner
I'm contractually obligated by my sponsors to appear in random fans' fantasies.
Danica Patrick
Smithers: I'm so happy I could hug you.
Mr. Burns: And have me smell like cheap drug store cologne the rest of the day? You may hug my shadow.
he will do my bidding... at that fantasy football auction and anything else my limited imagination can come up with.
Homer
This town can't teach its kids or collect its garbage, but we lead the nation in pointless revenge.
Homer
He was more than a friend. He was the reason I got up in the morning because he would inject me with coffee at six in the morning in the back of the head.
Smithers
I want to die quietly on my own term crushing as many of those baby sea turtles as I possibly can.
Mr. Burns
Give him what he wants. He's the only tax payer in this town.
Mayer Quimby (about Mr. Burns)
