"Connie's Celica"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 10, Lois gets a job as the music teacher at Chris and Meg's school and a mean student, Connie, makes her a target.

"Christmas Is Coming"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 9, when Meg takes Stewie to the mall to meet Santa, she has a surprising response while Stewie is scarred by the experience.


On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 8, Peter decides the best way to avoid Lois's special Thanksgiving dinner is to get arrested while Stewie has a secret revealed.

"Heart Burn"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 7, the Griffins recount their own versions of three well-known love stories in celebration of Peter and Lois' anniversary.

"Peter & Lois' Wedding"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 6, with the wi-fi out, Peter and Lois decide to tell the kids the story of how they met and fell in love in the '90s.

"Cat Fight"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 5, when Quagmire decides to open a cat café in town, Brian chooses to take a stand to get the café shut down.

"Disney's The Reboot"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 4, the network decides it's time to explore some unique ways to reboot the series and the feedback takes some surprising turns.

"Absolutely Babulous"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 3, Stewie receives a participation medal in his school's toddler games and then begins to question everything he has ever won.


On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 2, Peter straps on Joe's police bodycam to record his every move so he and his friends can remember what they do while drinking.

"Yacht Rocky"

On Family Guy Season 18 Episode 1, the brewery announces it will be firing one employee, and Peter is nervous he will be the one let go on the season premiere.

Family Guy Quotes

Oh, Lois just texted. Burgers or meatballs for dinner? I'll text back for you. Same things, bitch, just different shapes.

Stewie [to Peter]

Brian: You know, Connie, I think I have a theory about why you're such a bitch.
Connie: Excuse me?
Meg: Brian, let's just go.
Brian: No, no, no, no, no. Now hang on... hang on, Meg, hang on. You see, Connie, you're popular because you developed early and started putting out when you were 12. But now you can't stand to look at yourself in the mirror because all you see is a whore. So, you pick on Meg to avoid the inevitable realization that once your body's used up by age 19, you're going to be a worn-out, chalky-skinned burlap sack that even your step-dad won't want. How's that? Am I in the ballpark?
(Connie cries and runs)