Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS
How-i-met-your-mother

You've been pork free so long you're practically kosher.

She had a nice face, her booty was in place, but Barney don't chase.

She was a really great Lazer Tag partner. She's tiny so she's allowed to push kids.

Umm, is it getting crowded in here, because I think there are two peas in this pod?

And she sticks the landing, why don't you start stretching and I'll be right back.

Barney: Please, you might as well be dog-earing a tear stained bridal magazine while wolfing down the box of chocolates you had delivered to yourself at work from your fiancé that no one has ever met.
Bev: Gerard is real!

February 13th, a magical night, where a Ten has the self esteem of a four and the depraved enthusiasm of a Two.

Whoa check out that one! Her body is a perfect X.

It was actually pretty noble of him. He fell on his sword, so that she could fall on mine.

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