South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralPopular Butters Stotch Quotes
Well, my skin is springtime fresh, I suppose.
Get Well Soon, Kyle Song:
Butters: (singing) We're so sorry you're not feeling well.
We hope you're better soon.
So we're bringing you some sunshine
By, um, singing you this tune:
Everybody misses you
And though we hate to cause a fuss
We'd like to say, "Get well soon!"
And "Please don't die on us."
(Kenny comes through with Timmy and Butters)
Stan:This is it? This is everyone that wanted to help Kyle?
Butters: Well Clyde was gonna come too, but h-he said his mom was making tacos for dinner and Clyde likes tacos a whole lot.
Sister Anne: Now, let me explain how Communion works. The priest will give you this round cracker, and he will say, "The Body of Christ," and then you eat it.
Cartman: Jesus was made of crackers?
Sister Anne: No.
Stan: But crackers are his body.
Sister Anne: Yes.
Kenny: What?!
Sister Anne: In the Book of Mark, Jesus distributed bread and said, "eat this, for it is my body."
Cartman: So we won't go to hell as long as we eat crackers.
Sister Anne: Nononono!
Butters: Uh-well, uh-what are we eatin' then?
Sister Anne: The Body of Christ!
Stan: Nonono, I get it. Jesus wanted us to eat him, but he didn't want us to be cannibals, so he turned himself into crackers, and then told people to eat him.
Sister Anne: No!
Stan: No??
Butters: Huh-I can't whistle if I eat too many crackers.
Sister Anne: Look: all you have to know is that when the priest gives you the cracker, you eat it! Okay?!
Kenny, Stan, Cartman: O-kay.
I don't want to do it if it hurts or if it makes you get all sticky.
(about the manatee's the class is going to dissect)
Butters: HEY! Ours is still alive!
Mrs. Choksondik: Oh, hold on. (takes brick and pounds on the manatee's skull)
You can scoop it up in my R. Kelly thermos.
Linda: Just point us to a phone kid, alright?
Cartman: (laughs) I'm afraid you'll find all the phones... quite out of service.
Mark: No phones either! How do you communicate?
(Cartman pics up a jar, opens it up and speaks into it)
Cartman: Butters, I need an ETA on a car, stat! (closes the jar and hands it to a kid who walks out the door)
Mark: Alright we've had just about enough here. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. I don't care what little games you kids want to play, we just want out of here alright.
(Kid walks back in room with the jar & Cartman opens it)
Butters: (voice from jar) It's gonna be about 3 days.
Cartman: Outlander! Outlander! We have your woman! She still lives Outlander! Outlander! Her blood will spill.
Butters: What the heck are you talking about?
Cartman: Butters calm down alright.
(as Barbie) Butters, would you like to slap my titties around?
Mr. Stotch: Butters, away from the window, you're being grounded.
Butters: Sorry dad. I was just being the voice of a generation.
Hey Stan, why I sure am glad you're here, because now we'll have even more fun then we... then we was having before. We were having an awfully good time before you showed up however.
