Enzo: Do you wanna kill him or should I?
Damon: I hate deadlines.

Damon: You once told me that calling me "Satan" was an insult to Satan.
Caroline: Well... no one's perfect.

The nicest thing that Katherine Pierce will ever do is feed the maggots that feast upon her flesh.

Stefan: Define "out."
Damon: One who hovers and sticks his nose in other people's business. Wait... I was defining "annoying."

Alaric: You honestly think I'd leave Damon in charge and not look back?
Damon: He's talking about me, isn't he?
Jeremy: He says you're a dick.

Katherine Frickin Pierce can have a selfless moment, and I can't?

Matt: Who spends two years pining after a girl?
Damon: I can hear you, dumbass.

I donated my body to science. Except it was against my will.

That's my brother Stefan. But I'd watch your tone with him because he's kind in the middle of a psychotic break.

Damon: I'm gonna barf.
Katherine: Great. Then my work here is done.

Listen, how I got this amazing body has nothing to do with science.

Hang on. I only count two doppelgangers. Where's Crazy Pants?

Vampire Diaries Quotes

He's your first love. I intend to be your last. However long it takes.

Klaus [to Caroline]

Stefan Salvatore. Why Stefan? Why didn't you go for Damon? Or do you enjoy them both? Like Katherine did.

Isobel